Dominoes

If the economy is trying to stabilize, it’s hard to tell when you have so many people unemployed and businesses closing. So, the administration is trying to offer various stimulus plans to jumpstart the economy. I always heard that it takes money to make money. As some business folks do, they’ll spend money on advertisements, gags, offers, etc., to bring you into their stores. Yes, the ads and materials cost, but if the prices are right, we’re hooked. We’ll spend to get what we want if the price is right! The more we spend, the more we save! The more people spending, more people are needed to sell. More items sold, more produced. We all get the picture. The Domino effect. “Cash for Clunkers” seem to do pretty well for the auto industry. It’s helping dealers, the manufacturers, etc. I don’t know how long this will last. Where am I going with this? No matter what is done, you will not satisfy everybody! If it’s a great plan, they are still unhappy. They’ll find fault! But, notice that these negative folks don’t have a better plan, not even a plan at all. But, they have plenty of negative opinions. Is this what our society has become? Just an ungrateful bunch of unhappy people? Folks are worried about bills left for their grandchildren and legacy!? Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed! We can have one of the worse wars, epidemics, catastrophes the world has ever seen and we are worried about the future? But the voices speaking against the spending programs now didn’t seem to worry about it in the past. Is the real question government spending or too much government involvement?

Cream-Colored Pantyhose

Cream-colored thigh high pantyhose
with shiny, satiny sheen,
wrapped around long, big pretty
brown legs that were
molded by Nature’s Queen.

Red high heels on your feet,
emphasizing the arch of the
calves and back. Making
many a man and some women
moan,
just thinking of wanting
some of that.

Look at those gifts,
so full, so smooth and oh so soft.
Pointing, pouting, mocking,
waiting
for the kiss from my lips.

Cream-colored thigh high pantyhose
with a shiny, satiny sheen.
Thank you for giving yourself,
all of yourself, to me!

Excerpt from “A Part of Things”

Acts of Kindness

Chalk it up to old age or experience, I guess. I seem to be more compassionate now. I wasn’t when I was a younger man. Then again, it might just be that life has taught me that no man is an island. I actually enjoy acts of kindness and love. I enjoy seeing it and hearing about it! It’s good to see that people are still caring about their fellow man! You just can’t do everything alone. And if you use people to accomplish your mission, it’s just not satisfying. Oh, you get the job done, but you stepped on people to do it. In the process, people begin to see you as really are, a deceitful, conniving, have-it-my-way spoiled jerk. You might get to the top of your game, but when you look back, folks weren’t really on your side. Those people close you to you are using you as long as you got what they need. In the end, you wind up being all alone. The truth can be encouraging, not anti-supportive. We want you to succeed without any regrets on your part. And if you think you won't have any regrets, you're only fooling yourself!

Memories

In a low, calm voice, I heard the truth.
And from within,
I found unity and hope.

The sign read, ”Keep off the grass”.
So, in spite, I put my big
foot down and squashed
my doubts for tomorrow.

If I were a balloon,
I would float away,
leaving all my problems behind.
But I would still return deflated
flat on my face.

So regroup, folks!
Sit back and listen to your
favorite jams.
Drift away on pleasant
memories and think of peaceful things!

Excerpt from “A Part of Things”

The Quiet Place

The Quiet Place

The well-pruned trees, with their limbs pruned

close to the trunk appeared in the distance

as sentinels guarding the entrance to the past.

The columns and headstones stand as

bitter/sweet memories of those

loved and lost.

In this eerie silence surrounded by the oaks,

you can almost hear the murmur

of voices that told you the

differences of right and wrong

or let’s go do something.

Here, it is peaceful

save for the low hum of traffic in the distance.

Here, you hear the birds singing

praises to the unseen God.

Remember where you came from,

and to where you will return.

Take notice.

Someday, someone will hear your voice.

Excerpt from “A Part of Things”

More on Obesity

I found this write up in EURWEB. According to findings released last week by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), 25.6 percent of the nation’s Blacks, whites and Hispanics are obese - significantly overweight. However, Blacks are the most obese while whites are the least. The findings are derived from a CDC analysis of Behavioral Risk Factor Surveillance System (BRFSS) surveys conducted during the three-year period from 2006 to 2008. The analysis found that 35.7 percent of African Americans are obese compared to 28.7 percent of Hispanics and 23.7 percent of whites. Black women were the most likely to be obese. We are just too busy to look out for our health! Ladies, you just don't know how much you are loved!

The Birth Certificate Problem

This excerpt was on the internet this morning. "Despite the seemingly incontrovertible evidence, the issue shows no sign of disappearing off the radar of right-wing radio talkshow hosts and others who say the birth certificate is a forgery to hide the fact that Obama is foreign-born." You see regardless whether the birth certificate is now seen, "birthers" will still think it's a fake. You just can't please some people, no matter how hard you try. Their hearts are harden. Go to FactCheck.org for the source. You can't help but ask: How do you prove something to people who come to the facts believing, out of fear or hatred or maybe just for political purposes, that they're being tricked? Like I said in a previous entry, gullible.

Stroking the Hate Machinery

There are some media networks that are literally provoking the hate machine. They want this country to divide. And if it does, they have a president to blame. They will have a problem though, it will backfire! When you dig a grave for your enemy, dig two! You will be buried in the other! You would be surprised how many people believe something if it’s on email, the news or in the newspapers. Many people don’t see the biasness. Learn to rationalize and do more research than simply taking someone at their word. We normally get two opinions from doctors if we think we’re sick. We are so gullible. We are being led to the slaughterhouse and we are going willingly. Those folks in the media know what they are doing! Crap sells! It makes for more viewers and dollars. It doesn’t matter what element is attracted as long as the viewership increases! Yet, so many people profess they are Christians! So much for being Christ-like! Some people like to call themselves that and think their fooling somebody. Christ recognized Satan immediately! We as a people got some issues we need to resolve within ourselves. We all want to go to heaven but we’re asking the devil for directions!

We'll "Break Him"

Read the news lately? I don’t know about you but all I see is negativity. The worse bitterness is directed at our new President. Everyone don’t agree with his political agenda. That’s their prerogative. But, is that really the problem? I have never seen so much hate and hostility towards one man and his family since I don’t know when. Do you think that the powers-that-be (the movers & shakers of this country) would actually endorse a foreigner for President of the United States? Why are people still questioning his citizenship? John McCain was born in the Panama Canal Zone and there was hardly a ripple. Everyday in just about any article not even related to the administration does someone blog negatively of the president or his family. Somehow the administration was worked in a whale story. Some of these naysayers are using the guise of dissatisfaction of the economy to express their hatred. They are cowards! Be man enough to stand up and say I don’t like Obama because he’s black! Yes, America has progressed but look at some of the statements written and said. They are disgusting and shameful. Some folks are still judging you by the color of your skin. One congressman simply stated “We will break him.” That’s almost an excerpt from Willie Lynch’s letter, The Making of a Slave. Willie Lynch compared breaking slaves to breaking horses. Breaking a person to me, is one of the worse forms of reminding a certain group of people where their place is.

Left Behind

A pro boxer was killed in Atlanta over his possessions, he was 38. He was shot in the back. One of my lunch partners lost her best friend due to an illness, she was 40. Someone else lost their grandparent, 92. E. Lynn Harris, a famous author passed over the weekend, 54 due to illness. There are so many more that we will never know about. Some died at home and some away from home. Some are newsworthy and some are not. But one thing that’s certain, they are all important. This can be addressed on so many levels, but I want to look at only one, the friends and family that are left behind. Grief is never pleasant. We all know we won’t live forever and that tomorrow is not guaranteed, but there are people left behind that will truly miss us. All of us have our own way of coping. Some people are sick right now but still smile. Some are stressing because they know someone is leaving soon. Be respectful of each other. We never know what that person is going through.

Pass the Love to Your Children

This generation of children is faced with hypertension, diabetes, and other problems brought on by obesity and being overweight. Those of you who are blessed with children should do your utmost to pay attention to what they are doing with their lives. There are so many distractions these kids are faced with and they need your help. They don’t know how to tell you or expect you parents to understand! Some of you have got to win back your children. Somehow convince them that parenting is necessary for the child's own good. They'll rebel, we did too! We knew that they were not our friends but they taught us respect and accountability! Lead by example and get involved in your childrens' lives! They need you now more than ever! Show them the love you received when you were their age! That does include corrective discipline. (smile)

Remembering Our Childhood

When we were children, we couldn’t play in the house. We didn’t have the benefits of computers, cell phones, Gameboys, Nintendos and the like. You got 3 or 4 channels on the TV and that was it. Modern technology as we know it now, was probably at the beginning stages. But then again, we didn’t care! We also didn’t live in those big houses with huge rooms. We played outside and had a great time! We just had to be in the house or our own yard before the sun went down. Anytime, after was a mind-jarring and painful experience. We didn’t sass or talk back to our parents and we only had two chances to answer them when they called. The first time you might not have heard them, the second time you did. If you didn’t obey then, let’s just say “A spare rod spoils the child.” These children couldn’t handle what we had to go through. Then again, this generation is faced with a different set of problems than we had. These modern conveniences can be a benefit and a detriment to a child’s growth and appreciation. I’m going off on a tangent. What I want to say is children are not exercising anymore like they used to. In school, during, recess, we played, we had gym class. We played at home, in our yard, in other people’s yards, in the streets, and in the park. We had physical workouts and we ate balanced meals! It was safer then because neighbors and almost everyone else seemed to care what the children did. Now, it’s dangerous for children to play outside even in their own yards!

The Cop, The Professor, and the President

I know, I was supposed to talk about our children exercising but this mess came up recently regarding a black professor and a white policeman being called to the professor’s residence about a possible break-in. I want address this briefly and my next submission will be on the young ones. A neighbor called the policeman because it seemed that someone was breaking into her neighbor’s home. I want go into the details, I’m sure most of you are aware of the situation esp., since the President gave his opinion. Once again, we are like lambs led to the slaughter by the media. We haven’t enough sense to see what’s going on. We believe everything we read even if it’s only half of the truth. Yes, the President did say, ”The police acted stupidly after they realized that Gates was the owner of the house.” The media saw an opportunity and used only “acted stupidly” to generate more unrest and tension among the American people. Bad news sell and the media is all about selling! We are “acting stupidly” by allowing this kind of mind control to take over our will to be tolerant towards each other. The media is very aware of racial tensions and there are many of us unwilling to have a dialogue to discuss it. It’s a lot easier to blog than to talk face-to-face. There are pockets out here that do not want racial equality or peaceful coexistence. Let’s face it. Read the blogs, look at the news, talk to your neighbors, you will find that the more we progress, the more we become afraid. And until you walk for a while in another person’s shoes, you will never know what they had to walk through to get where they are. Obviously, many of us are unwilling to change. But many more of us are disgusted at the hatred and dislike for others that are still prevalent.

New Attitude

Let’s be realistic! It took time to put those extra pounds on us, so it will take time for it to come off! Some of us like to eat, so we need to back off, develop a new lifestyle which will include eating the proper foods, rest, and exercise. We must commit to these new changes and be patient. It may take a while for the change to come but we can feel it on the inside before we the changes on the outside. Some of us eat too much because of nervousness, boredom, low self-esteem, glandular problems or for various reason. These problems may require medical help. In fact, when we begin our new change, it wouldn’t hurt to let our doctor know. But we must begin the change with a new attitude. Regardless of what people think about our outside, we have got to feel good about ourselves inside! Take your time and don't over do it! We don't want to use adiet program without the doctor's advice. And we definitely don't want to hurt ourselves with these quick and easy weight-off-in-weeks plans! Take it slow, commit and dedicate! See yourself in the future looking good! Don't worry! I got something to say about the children next!

Developing a Healthy Habit

Our environment doesn’t always help with healthy lifestyle habits; it can encourage obesity. Some reasons are:

• Lack of neighborhood sidewalks and safe places for recreation. Not having area parks, trails, sidewalks, and affordable gyms makes it hard for people to be physically active.
• Work schedules. People often say that they don’t have time to be physically active given the long hours at work and the time spent commuting back and forth to work. We could find the time, if available and safe, walk at work.
• We like oversized meals. Americans are surrounded by huge food portions in restaurants, fast food places, gas stations, movie theaters, supermarkets, and even home. Some of these meals and snacks can feed two or more people. Over time, this will cause weight gain if it isn’t balanced with physical activity.
• Lack of access to healthy foods. Some people don’t live in neighborhoods that have supermarkets that sell healthy foods such as fresh fruits and vegetables. Or if they do, these items are often too costly.
• Food advertising. We are surrounded by ads from food companies. Most of the time children are the targets of advertising for high-calorie, high-fat snacks and sugary drinks. The goal of these ads is to sway people to buy these high-calorie foods, and often wedo. Then we think the kids got problems. We helped to get them started.

We Can Do It

Our weight is a result of many factors. These factors include environment, family history and genetics, metabolism, behavior or habits, and other factors. We can’t change our family history. But, other things—like our lifestyle habits—can be changed!

Obesity

Millions of Americans and people worldwide are overweight or obese. Being overweight or obese puts us at risk for many diseases and conditions. The more body fat that we carry around and the more we weigh, the more likely we are to develop heart disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, gallstones, breathing problems, and certain cancers.

BMIs

The National Center for Health (NCH) has also been tracking America’s obesity problem for more than four decades. Their findings given below support the growing obesity epidemic in America.
· Between 1962 and 2000, the obese people grew from 13% to 31% of the population.
· 63% of Americans are overweight with a BMI in excess of 25.0.
· 31% are obese with a BMI in excess of 30.0.
· Childhood obesity has more than tripled in the past two decades.
· Obesity is responsible for 300,000 deaths every year.

Overweight and Obesity

The National Heart Lung and Blood Institute states that “the terms “overweight” and “obesity” refer to a person’s overall body weight and where the extra weight comes from. Overweight is having extra body weight from muscle, bone, fat, and/or water. Obesity is having a high amount of extra body fat. The most useful measure of overweight and obesity is the body mass index (BMI). BMI is based on height and weight and is used for adults, children, and teens.”

Obesity Report

We’re going to start talking about obesity for a while. According to International Health, Racquet and Sportsclub Association (IHRSA) Obesity/Weight Control Report, the obesity epidemic in America is growing day by day. According to these numbers, we in the USA got a big problem. Yes, we are getting bigger daily: 3.8 million people have weight over 300 pounds. Over 400,000 people carry over 400 pounds, and many among these are males. The average adult female in USA weighs 163 pounds!

Take Time

Have you ever stood outside on a beautiful day and just listened to the sounds of life? Did you take the time to hear the birds chirping and the wind rustling through the trees? There’s always that one bird that seems to chirp the loudest! In the distance, you can hear car horns, motorcycle motors and depending on where you are, a baby crying and children laughing. Those of you that have done this before know what I’m talking about. If you haven’t, try it at least, once! I know we live in a society where we’re constantly busy working and don’t have time to enjoy the simple things in life. We don’t even notice that life is passing us by because we’re too busy working at living! Apparently, we do the same thing in our relationships. We’re too busy trying to make it perfect that we don’t realize we’re not either. Yep, what a tangled web we do weave! Try to make time for yourself and try to make time for the people in your life! You won't regret it.

Suicide Isn't Worth It

We have people wanting to give up their lives because someone doesn’t love them. We lose people who want to live when someone does love them! Life is already confusing, and yet we continue to confuse ourselves when we got enough problems as it is. Sometimes, I think we’re too smart for our own good.

Hardships and Memories

An old friend called me the other day. She told me how rough the first six months of this year was for her. She almost lost her sister due to diabetic problems, but did lose her boyfriend because of heart problems. Her sister survived, overcame her problems and is now developed a plan for living! Her boyfriend was 37 years old. This can be addressed on so many levels and I know you just don’t have the time to hear it! Life is so short but we still take everyday for granted! These two didn’t! She didn’t have not one regret about their time together! They loved each other deeply!

Make Payback a Success

Pay your exes back by proving you can do without them and do even better! Remember, you don’t have to worry about proving anything to them anymore! You are a gift from God! There is always somebody, somewhere, that appreciate good things! Hold your head up high and get your stuff together!

It's Not Over Because We Are Over

Let me repeat myself again regarding breakups! People, no matter how much you believe that you can’t live without the one you love, get on your knees and thank God for the blessing! You are still alive!! What is wrong with you!! There is never a cause for you to even think about taking your life, especially making someone that doesn’t love you, feel miserable! Besides, how would you know if you’re not around? To me, it doesn’t make sense! For all you know, that person might even be glad that you’re completely out of the picture! People are breaking up everyday!! Some have good reasons and some don’t need reasons at all! Get over it, get pass it, and move on! I discussed this in previous entries. It’s not worth the negative energy. I have heard this from a man earlier this week and a woman today. Look around you! Read the news, look at the boob tube, people you don’t expect to break up, do! We all want to feel special by the people we love but life is real and sorrow and hurt, as well as, joy comes and goes as long as we live! So, ladies and gentlemen, step up your game! Excel in your endeavors and make them regret that they lost a good thing! Be successful. Lean on God! Do not take your life, instead, improve it! You’ll be depressed for a while, that’s understandable, but a stronger person will emerge from it! I wish you well!

Get Over the Mistakes

We all make mistakes. Some we can recover from, some we pay the consequences. We made the choice and we might not have included God in that choice. At least, He forgives us even if we want. At the end of the day, whose forgiveness do you think will count? Don’t carry the burden and don’t let anyone put one on you. Remember God is always in control.

Pray for Carl

My friend Carl has been going through some health problems that the doctors can’t seem to diagnose. He’s been to dentists, optometrists, ophthalmologists, ear, nose & throat specialists, neurologists, and more. They are sending him to the Mayo Clinic. His problem is a constant throbbing behind between his eyes and ears, some type of headache. Since he’s taken medication for it, on a pain scale of 1-10, it’s at a daily level of 4 for right now. Before then, Carl has hit some peaks. I ask that if you are reading this to please say a prayer for him. Prayer works when nothing else does. Is it prayer or our faith in prayer that takes us forward? Does it matter as long as we get positive results? Does it matter Who you believe in as long as you have somebody to pray to? Speaking for myself, it does matter! I believe in God, our Creator, regardless of what scientists or anyone say!

Lifetime Battles

We fight battles everyday it seems over health, finances, education, relationships, co-workers, jobs, neighbors, whomever or whatever we feel that are causing us unhappiness. These burdens can get so heavy that if we don’t be careful, they’ll become an obsession and drown us. Many of us know that it’s the devil who’s stirring up contention. We knew this already. The devil has had centuries of conning and deceiving mankind. Satan is doing everything he can to destroy anything good and he will do whatever it takes. Distract you from God long enough, he got you. It’s not always major problems that cause the shakeups. It can be some trivial things that can blow completely out of hand. But for some reason, we just don’t go to God to have Him fight our battles. His door is always opened. We’re such an “instant” society that we expect results as soon as we tell Him our problems. All I can say God is always on time. His Divine Plan is not the same as ours, but He knows what He’s doing. Look around you, there’s problems everywhere. Since the beginning of time, there have been problems. And the only one to overcome them has been God. If we don’t take our eyes off of him, we won’t sink. Keep Him in front of you and He’ll fight your battles, God doesn’t mind. He can handle it. Don’t be discouraged and just pray more.

Who's Right, Who's Wrong

There are usually “two sides to every story”, depending on how many people involved, it could be more. How many doesn’t really matter, it just adds more “sides of the story.” The problems begin when you hear only one side from the person talking to you. You’re not hearing from all involved. But we still weigh the information because we believe in the person telling us. Well, someone believes in the other person’s story, too! So who’s right or wrong? Do we actually have all the information we need to form a conclusion? Sometimes, the evidence is shown on the person’s face or property. That’s a pretty strong argument for who was abused. Verbal abuse and the like are harder to see. I’m just saying don’t always think you’re heard everything if you haven’t heard the whole story. Somewhere in-between is the truth. I still believe that a lot of problems we still with, starts within. It’s just easier to blame someone else for our own faults.

Separate and Go

A young person told me that sometimes in relationships one partner can’t talk about some matters of the heart with the other. So they find someone else to talk to. It could be dangerous, if you’re not careful. We really don’t tell our partner for fear it will hurt them or cause problems. Love refuses to cause pain it should be the tool to communicate openly and freely. Unfortunately, we don’t use love unconditionally. We keep the one person we wanted to share life with, out of our lives. We would rather keep the peace than be honest and truthful. That’s not giving our mate much credit. We don’t think they are that mature or capable of handling the “hard stuff.” Instead, we just continue to put up with “it.” Sooner, if not later, the two partners are heading separate ways. You can’t get back the time you had. Once it’s gone, it is gone. So many of us live a lifetime of unhappiness (fake) rather than face true happiness (Honesty).

Young folks have a lot going on in their heads. They deserve more credit than we give them. We just have to take time with them and listen. They have a lot to say.

Thank you for the compliments many of you have given me! You all have been really encouraging!

A Change is Gonna Come, If You Try

Today, I stepped out of my comfort zone. I am definitely taking a leap in faith. My greatest fear has always been rejection. I am facing this fear today by submitting my request to people I respect to share a part of my life with to read this blog. It will now be open to positive and negative comments. But the most important thing I have learned is, you never know if you don't try. You have to fail before you succeed. This is an opportunity to learn more about myself and my thoughts. It also gives me a chance to see what other people think. I always believed that we all are no different other than our complexions. We laugh, we cry, we have great expectations. We all want the best that life can give. We love our families, we want good jobs, trusted friends and want to go to heaven, peacefully. We make mistakes, some we regret, some we learn from. We can only strive to be better people starting from within. Look around you, the world is changing so fast it's unbelieveable. People are dying, suffering and having some hard times. We should be grateful for what we have than nothing at all.

Make It a Happy Ending Anyway

If it's a great movie or book you enjoy the ending. It's better when you know that it’s a happy ending! We all like winners! This includes the loser throughout the movie who finally wins at the end! That means so much! The kid who finally stands up to bullies, the employee that finally got recognized with a pay raise and/or promotion. The guy who finally wins the heart of the woman he always loved. I’m sure we could think of many more. Unfortunately, we live in reality and there are not many happy endings in life. We make the best of what is given to us. We can roll over and give up or we can stand up and fight back when we’re down. It’s up to us to decide what we want from life. It can get tough sometimes but we got to stay positive. Have a great 4th of July!

Don't Be Discouraged

There will be times when you might feel totally discouraged and unappreciated. There will be moments when no matter what you do for others it will never be enough, no matter how much you sacrificed. There will be days of emotional rollercoaster rides questioning your choices and decisions. Pick yourself up by the bootstraps, lift your head up and thank God for the blessings you already have and will receive. He will bring you through. Be patient and wait for Him. I know, He has never let me down. Everything happens for a reason. Pray for the wisdom and courage to accept it.

Never Give Up

I heard something extremely interesting on the radio this morning leaving church. A caller asked the MC to pray for her because she was close to committing suicide. He asked her why. “Because, her man moved in with another woman and her three sons and them with nothing,” she replied. The ex had turned off all of the power to the home, took the furniture and even the food. He had stopped making house payments so the caller was left to scrambling to keep what was left, which was the house. She asked for prayer and thanked God that she was still able to keep the house, but her ex and his new woman kept harassing her. This was driving her to suicide.

What I found puzzling was the caller. She was willing to give up her life because she was heartbroken. She did not think of the effect it would have on her four year old son. To me that was selfishness to the nth degree.

We concern ourselves so much about the success of relationships that we fail to see the millions of other blessings God has given us. The primary one is life. We are healthy, breathing and living. There are so many people suffering right now with terminal diseases, loss of limbs, loss of mentally capabilities and yet, we struggle with someone that doesn’t love us. Where are our priorities? I know, in the material realm.

Some of us are still dealing with relationships, past, present and future. Whatever the reasons for the good, bad, betrayals, careers first, strife and contention, major and/or trivial disagreements, we must find an equal balance to share our lives together. When it becomes an imbalance, the joy is gone and soon the love will follow.

Life Is A Surprise

Let's see now, where do I start? The older you get, the more you see and learn. Of course, this can be an argument in itself. As a child, some things go right by you, primarily, bills and death. On June 25, 2009, Farah Fawcett and Michael Jackson died. The day before was Ed McMahon. As we get older, we realize that life is short and we just don't have time for nonsense. Yet, we continue to act childish everyday. You made me angry so I won't talk to you. Or, you don't have time for me anymore so my excuse is to find someone that will. If we act like a fool expect to be treated like one. The truth of the matter is, we don't know the time or place when we are called to return, hopefully, to our heavenly home. But, we do seem to find time to make our lives and/or others complicated.

What Have We Learned?

We are living in historical times! The first black U. S. President, and awesome first lady, the first black Attorney General, governors & senators admitting affairs and a governor suggesting to secede from the union (Texas) are just part of the experience we are living! So many exciting things are taking place. Just yesterday, South Carolina's Governor admitted that he was in Argentina with his mistress spending Father's Day with her instead of with his wife and four boys. We all make mistakes, some we regret and all we hope that we learned a lesson from them. Yes, I feel for all parties involved because betrayal is heart-breaker and sometimes you just don't get over it. It affects even the people not involved. Affairs are usually caused because someone's needs are not met by the other partner. What's worse it's not discussed with the partner to try to resolve those needs in a timely manner. Then it becomes to late to amend the problem(s). Love is beautiful but it can hurt worse than some of us can ever imagine. I'm not justifying affairs and I don't judge people's actions. If two people are willing to reconcile then the indescretions should not be brought up ever again. If their love is deeper than stolen honey, they should find the roots and fertilize that love and start over again!

I Know Where My Help Comes

I do want to be clear about something. Yes, I thanked all of those folks that have made an impact, directly or indirectly, in my life. But, let's not forget who brought these things to happen. I believe in God, Who has made all of these things possible. I doubt if anyone will read this blog, of course, that is possible. But understand this, without God in my life, I would not have survived this long. To Him we give the glory and praise. I know where my help really comes from. The apostle Paul said, "I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity." Paul also said,"I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me." Check out Phillipians Chapter 4.

Thanks For The Memories

To all of the people that have ever crossed my path, went along, left along, met and were forgotten during this journey in life, I want to say thank you. All of those moments and some brief made me who I am and who you are. Haven't at one time during your journey, you wanted to tell someone how much you appreciated them? Don't misunderstand me, I'm not being morbid. I am appreciating the many blessing I have received. So many times, we take these blessings for granted. People are blessings, too! We just don't know what we had until its gone. And we think we're getting something better! We do fool ourselves quite a bit. We call it upgrading when we look for someone else in our relationships. Our excuses are usually "we can't get along", "he/she is not my type", "not moving fast enough for me", or the most noted "we're not on the same level." Whatever excuse that can be found, as long as it works, will suffice. It doesn't always take much to fool ourselves.

Voice From the Past

I did hear from my oldest niece who is married and have 3 children of her own. That was wonderful news. I remember playing tennis with her when she was a little girl. Mom & I went to her high school graduation and hadn't seen her for over 20+ years. We lost contact with her and somehow she found out mom had passed and found me. People we let misunderstandings get in our way but not discussing the way they make you feel from the person imposing that misunderstanding on you. That's what happened to us and it was via mail. What's worse, we had a misunderstanding on 2 different issues! After all this time, each of us thought something different. 2 way conversations can clear up possible problems better than texting or writing. Life is short and many of us just don't seem to get it. Do we feel we are wrong? Not always. Do we think there is a need to apologize? Again, not always. We are just lost, but we think we are on point. We have yet to understand the reason we are here in the first place. What makes us so smart that we know about handling the problem of living, of living with others?

Rest In Peace, Ron

It's been a while since my last post. One reason for me was getting too personal. Honestly, laziness. On June 9, 2009, the grandson of my confirmation God-Parents passed in his sleep. He was 44 years old. He left peacefully. I have always been close to his mother and grandmother which I consider a sister and mother, respectfully. They were there when my mother went to her heavenly home. He was a good young man who simply saw the best in life regardless of how life can throw curves your way. Maybe, if we made the best out of bad situations we could see things in better. But, since we bring a lot of problems on ourselves, we cloud our vision with regret and guilt. We fail to see the positive. Be careful how you treat people and what you say to people. There will come a time when you will need somebody.

Happy Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day!! Happy Mother's Day!! I went to the cemetary, yesterday, and what was surprising to me was that I did not cry. I really expected to, but I have come to the point that I am at peace with myself. I placed a wreath at her grave and visited my father, grandmother, great grandmother and my oldest brother. I looked for my aunt but I couldn't find her. Nevertheless, I prayed for all that were there. Every day is a beautiful day, cherish it. Remember your ancestors and make them proud!

Happy Easter

Happy Easter! This is the day that Christ had risen! Let's not forget it! I went to Mass this morning and it was standing room only! The priest said how beautiful the lilies looked. He was not talking about the Easter lilies on the altar but the Easter lilies that came to Mass! This is a time to meditate and think of the ulitmate sacrifice made for love and salvation. This is also a time to think of the loved ones that are no longer here to share with you this glorious day! Some have separated, divorced, and moved on. Others have found their home with Our Lord and those are the ones, I, myself, truly miss! Last year, my mother passed the day after Easter although the dates were a week earlier. It does not matter to me, the day after Easter is the day after Easter. This was one of her favorite holy days, mom loved to sing and she sang at every holy day! When she got ill last year in 2008, deep inside of me, I knew she would rather sing at Mass. Well, I bet she's singing her heart out now! I love you, mom! It hurts sometimes, but I know that you don't want me to be sad! The best tribute I can give you is be a better man!

Where is Your Strength?

CHANGE, you made some good points. But keep in mind that there are two kinds of people in this world. People that will do and people that won't do. This can be argued on many levels but the basis holds true. What do we do when we know that we have the potential to excell? Are we afraid to strive for better things? Has rejection in loves and relationships cause us to lose focus within? You sound like someone who does have the potential to be more than you are. What are you willing to give up? You don't have to sell your soul to be successful. Just make up your mind to do it. Time waits for no one and the day will come when you wake up and find out you could have done but did not. Don't blame anyone for your mistakes.

Be Reasonable

Fellas, if your woman leaves you, but returns to discuss the reasons for the departure, don’t mistake the conversation as a way to get her in bed. True, you might be making up but that does not give you a reason to pregnate her to show your love. That’s not exactly responsible. A baby is not the answer. Some type of pressure was already the cause of the separation. Why add even more. But it all depends if either of you want the other one back anyway. Pregnancy is a helluva payback. By the way, she might want to get pregnant by you for payback. What an ironic twist. Real love is letting go and knowing that your love is in good hands. Accepting each other for the individuals that they are. Otherwise, if they are abusive in anyway, distrustful of any kind and damn deceitful for whatever reason. Exit, peacefully, and don't look back!

Imperfect People Make for Imperfect Relationships

Keep in mind, no relationship is perfect. We're going to screw up. It's not intentional but somewhere along the line, we hit a plateau. It's like losing weight. The last ten pounds don't want to budge. So what do we do to lose the pounds? Experts say shock the body muscles with diet and exercise. In other words, when the relationship gets stagnant, we have to do something different to bring back the magic. Maybe the parties involved need to be more creative and free in expressing their appeal for each other. I can't tell you what to do. That's something you and your mate must be comfortable doing. I definitely will not say go to work with your mate to have quality time because that's a crock. Quality time is not sharing work experiences. That's like you are a mortician and your mate hates being around dead people but your business is booming and you don't have time to spend at home or with your mate. So your idea of quality time is now having your mate come to work with you? Lets get real! We are not children. My professing my love for you does not mean doing something that I don't like and getting rediculed by you because I'm not spending quality time with you! Is it another excuse for you to find to end the relationship?

Love is Temporary

Think about it! What do we do when we are rejected, turned down or kicked to the curb? We feel sorry for ourselves! Our world stops!! We will never love again. We were pressured to act accordingly because that's what proving love is all about. We can be patience for them but they can't be for us. So we stay in these relationships giving excuses why it's necessary to be there. We have the choice and really no one can force us to do what we don't want to do!! Yet, it happens everytime. We always back down, it's what we do. I am still a sucker for love. I still believe it is real and unconditional. I also believe that it is temporary so enjoy it while you can! If that person loves you half as much as you love them, then be honest and communicate. Hopefully, you both can have something to be proud of.

Appreciate the Now

People come in and out of our lives. They are here to give us assistance, guidance and/or direction. Some of them give us love that we hope are permanent but usally temporary. We have talked about this before. Love is temporary even though we would like for it to last forever. But, if it stops coming from the one we do love, we can't stop loving ourselves. Too many of us sacrifice our self-esteem, confidence even independence to prove our love. Our world will not end because the love from another ends. All of us are better than that! It does not matter what we look like to them but it does matter what we look like to ourselves! And if we don't like the way we look, change!!!

It's Hard to Read Between the Lines

Sooner or later, you'll notice that she is pulling away. But during the meantime, she was being taken for granted. We guys really don't see between the lines. We think an apology, flowers and a I love you will keep the homefront steady. Our problem, our biggest problem is time. We always think we'll have another hour, day or month to make things right. What we sometimes have to offer is just not worth their time. Yeah, they might be happy at the time that you think everything is cool. It's a short time benefit without long term effects.

U-N-I-T-Y

Men & women see things differently, it’s our nature. At times, we will even disagree strongly about it. It depends on the dominant figure in the relationship. I believe that when the issue involves us collectively, we do come together. Unified, there is nothing that we cannot handle. Opposed, we will fall. Most of the time, the woman will win. How we handle our differences will depend on how greater the loss. In that case, who will be blamed for the failure? And where do we go from there?