Easter At My Cousins!

 

Love You, Mother Bennett!

            A few weeks ago, I wrote about my 102-year-old godmother entering the heart hospital due to respiratory issues.  She was retained for three days for medication and observation.  When she was released, she could not return to independent living and had to be moved to assisted living, requiring 24/7 care.  When I visited her at the hospital, it was hard for me to see her in her present condition.  I have been so used to seeing her moving about on her own, talking satirically, and being so sharp-minded that I couldn’t speak for a few seconds.  I saw a frail, little woman with oxygen tubes gazing into an unknown, unaware that someone was in the room.  I called her name and awakened her from her trance.  She recognized me after a few minutes of conversation.  I felt her pain and concern.

 

            I felt, in my heart, that her desire to leave this world would come true. My wife and I visited her at her new location with her granddaughters. She spoke to us briefly but then nodded off to sleep.  This place was where her body and mind would only stay for a while.

 

            This morning, we were told by her granddaughter that she transitioned last night. April 19, 2024, at 7:30 p.m.  We know that you are at peace, Mother Bennett.  Your pain and suffering are now indescribable and inexpressible joys in heaven, your new home.  We love you and will miss you.  You have made an amazing impact on many people’s lives.

              I believe that Heaven rejoices whenever a family member returns home after their final journey.  And we should do the same even as we mourn the loss.

YouTube Dancing, Old School Style!

            I found a new video on YouTube that got my attention lately.  They aren’t doing anything fancy or particular about it except elderly, black folks swing dancing from the oldies but goldies music from the fifties to the seventies.  They are swinging and twirling more than stepping, but it’s interesting to see great-grandparents and grandparents finding time to recreate memories.  I don’t recognize most of the music.  I tried to use Shazam and Google to identify the artist and song, but neither app recognized the sounds.  Some I did, such as Shotgun by Junior Walker and the All-Stars, Barry White, and Al Green from the seventies.

 

            These old folks, dressed in their finest, put aside their walkers and canes, find new dance partners, and enjoy themselves with their dance moves.  I remember that in my military days, we wore colorful outfits and shoes to match.  According to the video's time, they will dance for at least three hours. I don’t look at them that long, but it may be less than an hour.  I enjoy seeing them gliding and acknowledging friends on the dance floor.  It could be the music my parents played when I was a child that has me fixated on what memories they had.  Or, it could be in my aging process, my memories of when I danced.  Then again, how did people see me on the dance floor when I thought I looked cool and dancing smooth?  It took being under the influence of alcohol to get me on the dance floor.  I needed an excuse to dance.  They didn’t.

 

            They have their own building that they attend to hold various functions and celebrate birthdays. The birthday celebrant wears a sash over their shoulders, and people pin money on it.  The seniors have their DJ, who is attentive to them, calling them by name, giving them shout-outs, and making the people comfortable.  I can only imagine how they feel and long for those days gone by.  Deep down inside, I am drawn to them because I am interested in discovering more about my ancestors in Ancestry and Roots Magic.  I do imagine what they went through during slavery, emancipation, reconstruction, Jim Crow, and even in these present times.  We all need to have pleasant things to think about and press forward.

Good Friday!

            Today is Good Friday. A thousand-something years ago, at this time, Jesus Christ was judged, arrested, beaten, stripped, and crowned with thorns that protruded from his head. He will take a journey carrying his cross, our sins, to be crucified. Give or take a few minutes; he will arrive around 9 a.m. to be hung for about six hours and die around 3 p.m. on the fated Friday. He didn’t want to sacrifice his life for people he didn’t know or love, but Jesus was an obedient son who trusted in his Father.

 

            We all have taken some journeys under fear and doubt, not knowing the outcome. I’m not sure we’d go through with it if we knew. Yet, there are people, including veterans, who have given their lives to save the many. They might be recognized later, but how many are forgotten over time? Those impacted by the trauma probably won’t; they will not take the sacrifice for granted. Have we forgotten what Jesus Christ has done for us?

 

            We all have heard this story, and whether we believe it or not, if this even happened, there’s a feeling that something did. Let’s take a few minutes today to think about our journeys.  Did we make any sacrifices? Were we anxious and afraid? Did we complete the assignment and come out stronger? Are we repeating the experience daily, especially during sleep and quiet times? Don’t take anything for granted; Jesus knew when his time would come, but we don’t. No excuses.

Always Valuable!

            My wife and I visited Mother Bennett this past weekend.  At 102, she’s still feisty and quick-witted.  Her granddaughters have a hard time keeping up with her.  The older daughter gets stressed when her grandmother says no to any assistance she offers but accepts it when it’s done, while the younger daughter takes it in stride.  It doesn’t matter to her; Grandma will get over it.

 

            As I watched the interaction between the three women, including my wife, I felt their sincere, unconditional support for each other. I also saw how frail my Godmother was. Once solid and independent up to 101, it seemed just overnight that she became dependent overnight. The scene reminded me of the words to a song about the young becoming old and everything must change. We will all change whether we like it or not.  Growing old lonely doesn’t help.

 

            My godmother mentioned that she is ready for God to take her home.  She has outlived her friends, husband, one of her children, and my dearly departed Godsister, who I considered my biological sister.  Her remaining son is almost 78 years old now.  Her question now is, what can she do for anyone when she can barely care for herself?  Who needs her now?  She looks at her pictures of being young and reminisces about days gone by. I try not to look in mirrors to avoid looking at how old I’m becoming. I’m looking like my father as I get older.  We might try to slow time down, but we can’t stop it. I have learned that we will always be valuable to someone.

 

I fully understand the elderly.  Currently, I’m physically healthy and, at the time, mentally capable, as well as capable of doing things for myself by God’s Grace. There are folks in their 40s who can barely brush their teeth. Yes, I have aches and pains from areas that I didn’t know I had.  Work through them.  Do what you can while you can.

Moments!

            The thought came to me today regarding how moments should be cherished.  It could be due to me getting older and accepting that I will not be on the earth forever.  Also, listening to the beautiful music of string violins, violas, cellos, and pianos could put me in a melancholy mood.  I cannot ignore laughing with my wife and having serious conversations about discussing whatever we want are moments. Walking, listening to concerts, and sharing our time are moments when we can do things together.  Moments,  when people can share with each other.  Moments and times when opportunity will never happen again in this lifetime.

 

            We often take these moments for granted until we realize how important they were after they passed, especially after our friends and loved ones have.  I won’t discount disappointments or discouragements.  They are memorable, unforgettable moments that will always impact our lives.  They will always be reminders of our choices and will most likely never leave.  The Japanese have a saying for the concept, “Ichi-go, Ichi-e, meaning “Once in a Lifetime.”  Enjoy the present moment as it is unique and unrepeatable.

 

            Sometimes, I was uninterested or not wanted to go or participate in any event or function.  When I did go, I was apprehensive or skeptical, but it was over, I truly enjoyed myself.  I’ve learned to become present; even though it took some time, I became more aware of the opportunity I was given.  I hope you do the same one day.

Losers and Suckers!!

            I read a post in a local neighborhood newspaper regarding voting last week.  The author, a veteran, wanted all veterans to vote “blue” “since “45” thinks we’re suckers and losers.”  Another veteran responded by paraphrasing that all veterans are conservative and will always vote as conservatives and not as Liberals.  Therefore, to me, he indicated that all veterans are suckers that will support people who will call us losers and suckers and disgrace those that gave their lives for this country or were caught as prisoners of war.  What he didn’t say was voting for people who support Russian ideals, attacking democracy, and dividing America is a benefit for those in Congress who want to stay in power.

 

Naturally, the veteran’s response was subjectively given.  He did not consider the racial injustices that many minority veterans were subjected to and how they might have felt returning to America and not being accepted in local cities as patriots who survived the war and faced hometown discrimination as if nothing had changed.  He won’t know the injustices and prejudices minorities underwent because he wasn’t mistreated like one.  Either he doesn’t know military history or never tried to learn it.  He sounds like someone who hasn’t shared the experiences minorities had.  This person must have forgotten the Tuskegee Syphilis Studies or how the U.S. Army hung 97 black soldiers, members of the Buffalo Soldiers in 1917 at Fort Houston because they defended themselves against a mob of white men who attacked them.  Let’s move the time up to Vietnam, where minorities still did not want to serve but were placed on the front and take the full assault of the enemy to buffet their fellow soldiers or be the first ones in the tunnels. There are many more instances, past and present, but I hope someone understands.

I’m a veteran and will not have allegiance to anyone I cannot trust.  As for my politics, I support candidates with similar ideas for this country with the best interest of all Americans in mind.  I support those not afraid to speak out against injustices, lies, and wrongs that divide this nation.  I support those who support the military in every possible way and do not humiliate them. I am realistic enough to know that money counts for every campaign, but I respect those not controlled by it.  They made the same pledges to this country for their office as we veterans.  Some of us kept them.

 

This country, as we write, has so many homeless, unemployed, uninsured veterans who are not in any political conversations unless it’s voting time.  Veteran discussions come up only during Veterans Day and campaigns.  I feel, at times, that minority veterans are the lost voices in America.  Returning to the veteran’s response, he doesn’t know how other veterans feel, especially those with dishonorable or bad conduct discharges who are disqualified from receiving medical services from the VA.  He does not represent me.  Yes, I was conservative at a time when bipartisan politics worked for this country and did not waste time infighting.  I still am. However, I choose not to follow the herd blindly. I’m keeping my ears and eyes open, and I will not sleep on bull s###.