Tolerance, Tolerate or Both? Is There A Balance?

Merriam-Webster explains that there is a distinction between the two words.  "Tolerate" is a verb that indicates an action, meaning either to allow without hindrance or to put up with.  "Tolerance" is a noun referring to the ability to endure hardship or pain, as well as the act of allowing something or showing sympathy for beliefs or practices that differ from one's own.

 

I have noticed that some people express a low tolerance for foolishness and incompetence, and I can relate to that sentiment. However, I have come to realize that others may feel the same way about me. We all make mistakes and have to learn from others. When someone struggles to complete a simple task, I can sometimes become impatient. However, I realize they may be dealing with challenges that I am unaware of or don't understand. I may even be the one preventing them from learning. 

 

I understand that I can come across as harsh or arrogant. I may use unnecessary language and my approach may be intimidating. I acknowledge that I may have a biased mindset and that others may be tolerating my behavior. To improve, I try to put myself in their shoes and treat them with dignity and respect. After all, I would want others to treat me the same way, regardless of our differences in color, beliefs, lifestyles, and social standings.  The question remains if we are all imperfect, why are we still intolerant in the 21^st century?  Is this truly a question for some or a problem for others?

 

As we live together, we choose to tolerate certain things in the name of peace and compromise. For example, I tolerate my wife's cooking and she tolerates my snoring. We also tolerate our children's music and our neighbor's barking dogs, but there may come a point where we can no longer handle the discomfort. In those situations, we may have to reconsider the investments we've made over the years. Sometimes it's easy to forget the value of forgiveness and mercy, especially when we've faced judgment from others and felt like second-class citizens.  How can we overcome our selfish tendencies and embrace acceptance, even if it requires enduring economic difficulties?

Struggles and Conflicts!

Everyone faces struggles, whether they are internal or external, big or small, pleasant or unpleasant. Conflicts can arise anywhere, from the classroom to the workplace, from hospitals to families, and beyond. They usually begin in uncomfortable situations when someone disagrees with you in some way. I have seen conflicts arise due to differences in appearance, competition, intelligence, skin color, religion, and politics. Most conflicts arise due to a lack of honesty, humility, and direct communication. These are the foundations for understanding and finding peace. Some people prefer to talk to others about their problems rather than addressing them directly. However, this approach can cause more harm than good, leading to disruption, distraction, and stress for everyone involved.

 

Struggles and conflicts affect everyone, from the powerful to the poor, except for the dead. If left unresolved, they can cause mental, social, physical, and spiritual harm. Conflicts can destroy a person's well-being and happiness, leading to regrettable actions and outcomes. It is important to avoid pride and control our emotions in order to maintain balance and avoid negative consequences. The tongue has the power of life and death, and we should use it wisely. 

 

When we face challenges, we may turn to God for help. Sometimes, it may seem like our prayers go unanswered, but we should not interpret this as punishment. God is loving and wants to help us, even in difficult situations. It is up to us to take responsibility for our actions and seek guidance and support from God. Life is full of ups and downs, and it is up to each person to handle them with mercy and grace.

What Have I Been Doing?

    Over the years since losing my loved ones, family and friends, and being diagnosed with PTSD, I’ve been hesitant to submit entries to this blog. I did not seem to have the energy to type anything other than Happy Birthdays and Rest in Peace Titles. The subjects portrayed emptiness, depression, and some anxieties I felt within myself.  For me, the future during this time was depressing, the same as the news. Giving my opinion in the early days, released some stress and I felt better afterward. I wasn’t concerned if anybody ever read it, or if anyone cared. I was relieved to get the negativity out of me. Still, I have been lazy and complacent, I lost myself in my emotions. This is my excuse, for now.  Excuses, do not hold up for long, they will be exposed later. I’d rather expose mine now.

 

    In this age of social media and technology, I felt my age and that the world was changing before my eyes. Facebook, Snapchat, YouTube, and the like surrounded me with content and the risk-takers who were jeopardizing their lives and others to get subscriptions and likes. I was never a fan of therapists who on old TV shows picked their subject’s minds making them feel less than.  I stereotyped all “shrinks” as manipulators until I started attending sessions. Now I look forward to the sessions.  I’m with a great group of veterans who suffered and gone through similar situations and who understood and respectfully agreed to disagree on many topics we shared and we all knew that what was said and heard would be kept confidential. I must give a shout-out to the therapists who assists us, they were always there for us and never gave up on us.  The few we have with us are overwhelmed by the increasing numbers but we have never heard them complain about carrying the extra burdens.  Where are our elected officials who say they care for the veterans during an election year but never do anything to help us?  We have to beg and plead for compensation, benefits, and housing and still get turned down, but they will support the Department of Defense for more killing materials.  I wonder if they really cheer for the home team in private.

 

    I must regain the same excitement that started me on this journey.  I wanted to record my thoughts then and I still want to continue.  It doesn’t matter if journaling is a gift or talent, I pray that this will be a platform to relay positive and honest messages.  I hope to use this platform to share experiences and opinions with the reader.  I’ll leave the past behind and move forward. I will leave these old experiences at the altar. I look forward to this redemption.

Today is Mother Appreciation Day!

Happy Appreciation to all mothers, biological, foster, new, past and old! You should be appreciated every day.  Thank you for the love and support you have given us through out our lives. You have sacrificed so much for us that we may never know. God bless you all!

Happy Birthday, Mother Irby.

October 3, 2020 was your transition home, Mother Irby but your birthday, today on the 24th of March, 2023 would have made you 89 years old! We miss you and love you so much!

Miss You, Mom!

 Another year and I'm still missing you, mom. You returned home in on March 24, 2018 and it's 5 years later. You'd be 82 now. Love you forever.

Happy 101 Birthday, Mother Bennett!

 What a blessing to live with all of your abilities and a sound mind. Mother Bennett is still taking care of herself and enjoying life. Somehow in all this social chaos, she has found peace. We wish you the best, Mother Bennett! We love you!