Let Go Of The Past Hurts and Let God In For Future Blessings!

I’ve been self-incarcerated for almost 30 years.  It was a bad feeling being behind a self-imposed prison caused by my divorce. I had still harbored angry and bitter feelings toward my ex-wife.  I thought I had forgiven her but you can’t forgive someone if you stay angry with them.  You must forgive and forget!  I realized that my anger was misdirected and when we last talked, I called back to apologize for my rudeness.  I prayed to God to release this anger and bitterness.  I had a revelation that I wasn’t angry with my ex-wife, I was angry at where we should have been together!  The sad irony about all of this is I dwelled on where we both could have been instead of moving forward where I should have been.  I couldn’t successfully continue other relationships because I saw her in them and did not give anyone a chance for fear of being hurt.  Being unforgiving can cause you more harm than a disease.  Carrying baggage is more than a burden, it’s a handicap. It’s crippling.  The older the baggage, the worse the back will ache and the mind torment.  I let someone else deny my dreams while I sat back doing nothing about it.  We blame people for our own actions.  How pitiful and pathetic I am.  After this eye opening event, I realized that my purpose is in this life is not yet over and I am a better man for this.  I wanted to be in control and lost. I had to yield to God Who always remains in control.  There is a distinct difference between regret and anger.  I don’t regret ever being married to her, she is a wonderful woman.  We could not compromise on our differences.  Was it pride or individualism, I don’t know.  It was probably that and more.  But I do feel lighter mentally and ready for a new chapter in my life.  We all have struggles. Don’t be angry or jealous of someone else’s blessings.  We don’t know what they been through to get where they are.  The sun shines and the rain falls on the good and bad.  We should treat each other as we would like to be treated and keep God first and foremost in our lives.  Things don’t always go as we like but we can keep a positive attitude so that the next time it happens we can find a learning experience from it.  We have to let go and let God.

We Stayed Put!

Excerpt from A Part of Things:

I am clumsy and portly while she is graceful and agile. She is quick-witted and intelligent but I catch on after a few minutes. She is patient and kind while I’m the opposite. While she remains loving and caring, I have a long way to go to overcome my selfishness and pride. She is Black and I am White. She is the opposite in all things except two important similarities. We both believe in God and trust in Him. Maybe that’s why I care so deeply about her. I don’t know about her political affiliation, it was never discussed. We are both military veterans, she from the Navy and me from the Air Force, we teased each other about that a lot.

I was concerned about how interracial dating would affect us and our friends. But it was more important, to me, how we respected and trusted God. I believe if we keep Him first and foremost in our lives, we’ll be able to survive the storms that will come because of our differences. The stares and the nasty remarks will come and it was hard not to react in kind. Portia’s attitude did not seem to let it bother her. She would still smile, make jokes, hold hands, and reassure me of her love. I loved her, too. My problem is falling in love too easily. I read the signs wrong and then I’m broken when love isn’t reciprocated.

Portia made sure I ate the right foods and exercised. She said she wanted me around as long God would keep me and that there was need for me to rush. I didn’t know how to take this kind of affection. I felt that after my divorce if given a second chance I would live differently. Portia has two great kids from her previous marriage, an eighteen year old young lady and a fourteen year old future NFL/CPA superstar. She worries about those children more than anything. I respect her so much for that. All mothers want only the best for their children.

Another problem I have is we work together and I don’t want her embarrassed or harassed by our co-workers. It might be the 21st century but people really haven’t progressed enough to accept interracial relationships. I know, I was like them until the past two years, when my best friend married a black woman. I always believed that you don’t have to go outside your race to find love. Now here I am feeling Portia. I got issues.

But none of these issues matter. They are not real. They are products of my imagination. I know that this can’t happen because I’m really stuck in my old ways. We stayed put. Portia will never know my feelings about her. I just wondered what would make my life different.

A Part of Things ©

Tonight – John Legend ft. Ludacris!!

Lately - Anita Baker

We tend to forget the simple things.  Maybe we really didn't love each other as much as we thought we did.

Drive Sober or Get Pulled Over!

DUI Fatalities at the State Capital, Columbia, SC, August 16, 2012

We hear, read, and see almost everyday about DUI-related collisions and deaths.  Some of the victims we might know personally.  We know it’s wrong to drive under the influence but some of us still do.  I don’t need to provide statistics or links to web sites to support the problems we are having on our highways.  All of us want to make it from point A to point B safely and return home safely.  We all want our family and friends and the people we love to come back home safe.  A nationwide crackdown is going on.  Help law enforcement get these offenders off the road.  Call them in, get tag numbers, vehicle descriptions, but don’t endanger yourself.  There’s enough danger on our roadways as it is.  So, please take a proactive approach by not getting behind the wheel driving.  Stay at home, get a designated driver who doesn’t drink, or get a taxi if you know you’re going to have a “couple of drinks.”  The penalties will cost a lot more than the drinks. Remember there’s someone that loves you and wants the best for you.

Dealing With The Moments!

Remember a baby’s very first steps and first words, a loving first glance and first stolen kiss, a faint scent of perfume and a song that reminded you of someone special? Did those moments and events make an impact in your life? Did you see the significance? If you didn’t think they were important to you, someone else did. Some actions remain constant even if others completed them. All events will be important to some one.

We may not all feel important and question if our lives are meaningless because we didn’t leave a legacy for others to admire or respect. Well, living isn’t existing, it’s doing something that will affect positively the lives of those that you cross paths with. We all have a purpose and most of the time we don’t know what it is. And if we think we do know it, we still doubt that it would serve any importance anyway. We make life complicated and take our dissatisfaction out on the people that are close to us.

But our purpose doesn’t have to be complicated. It could be a simple thank you to the cashier that’s been on her feet all day and just had a customer take their bad day out on them. It could be that waiter that’s working their way through school or taking a job to support their family and could use a kind voice and tip. It could be just saying something nice to a co-worker and neighbor. We don’t know the struggles that others are going through, we only see ours. Their lives are important and significant, too. Somewhere along our journey, we got numb to village living. We think we no longer need anyone to help us unless they are of some necessary value to us. Our values are misplaced, let’s pray to God that it’s not too late. Too many good people have crossed our paths and helped us along our journey and we took them for granted. Let’s not lose anymore.

Definition of SIGNIFICANCE   (Merriam-Webster)

1.  a : something that is conveyed as a meaning often obscurely or indirectly
     b : the quality of conveying or implying
2.  a : the quality of being important : moment
     b : the quality of being statistically significant

Healthcare Will Raise The Cost of Papa John’s Pizza!!!

I have to talk about this for jus a minute because this, to me, doesn’t make sense of so many levels.  “The National Restaurant Association pointed out following the health care law's Supreme Court approval that it may adversely affect restaurants’ ability to maintain already slim profit margins because it requires companies of more than 50 employees to provide affordable health insurance.” “Already slim profit margins?” Duh, people are really trying to eat healthy and are we sure pizzas are that healthy?  Several reasons could be behind the slim profit margins.  Maybe people don’t have the extra money to splurge on pizzas.  Could be a lot of people aren’t working who usually buy pizzas.  The costs of ingredients are going up because of the bad weather affecting crops and now being passed to the consumers.  People could just be tired of being overweight and obese and staying away from these kinds of food.  Quite possibly, DiGiorno’s pizza is a lot less inexpensive.  Papa John's CEO, John Schnatter says, “That Obamacare will result in a $0.11 to $0.14 price increase per pizza or $0.15 to $0.20 cents per order.”  I wonder if he’s really resenting having all of his employees on healthcare?  The Affordable Care Act only requires employers to offer health insurance to full-time employees, almost 90 percent of whom at large businesses like Papa John's corporate offices are already covered, according to a Treasury Department official.  Then, maybe John Schantter has other issues with President.  I don’t know, just saying.