Group Therapy Works!

I made time to attend my veteran group meeting earlier this afternoon. We had another engaging session today. It’s no coincidence that we, these sisters and brothers, are brought together. Our facilitator, Dr. S, is a veteran who has walked a similar path to ours. She leads and guides us but never imposes. Dr. S's understanding and compassion are genuine; she is the real deal and has the group’s respect. In our group, everyone is caring, honest, and truthful, creating a safe space for us all.

The subjects today affected us all. We have so much in common emotionally that we empathize and sympathize with each other. However, I did not participate this time. I was too busy thinking of my doubts and fears and how I deal with them every moment of the day. Some may think that what works for them may not work for others, but if you don’t share what works for you, how will you know if it won’t? At least give the person a chance to work it out. I was selfish today and didn’t follow the Spirit’s calling to share Philippians 4-7. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Everyone has their cross to carry. Don’t be fooled or envious if their cross seems lighter than yours. Pray for divine wisdom and understanding because you don’t know what that person has been through, gone through, or found a way to make that burden appear lighter to an observer. I read 13 Bible verses each day to make it through the day. I know about depression, panic attacks, insecurity, and vulnerability. I know about distrust, discrimination, hatred, and envy. I sometimes seem overwhelmed, but I believe the words I read daily are accurate and truthful. I believe that if I trust God’s Words, whatever I go through, good or bad, He is still in control and loves me even if I don’t deserve it. Jeremiah 29:11 reads, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” The apostle Paul said, “For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39. I share these verses with you to inspire hope and remind you of the power of faith in our journey.

As the discussion unfolded, the elders stepped in with their wisdom. Yoyo suggested a lighthearted distraction, blaming bodily gas, while KT proposed a way to help family members cope with painful memories. Other members offered their insights and solutions. However, I stood on the sidelines, feeling I didn’t have enough time to contribute. Looking back, I deeply regret not seizing the opportunity to share my thoughts and experiences. I want to express my sincere apologies for not valuing your input more. My major obstacle was inserting God into the conversation without offending anyone. I sincerely believe that I would not be present without Him being by my side. 

After reading, I do non-strenuous exercises, such as breathing, stretching, walking in place, alternating pumping my arms and holding them up towards the ceiling, and whatever may come to me, including push-ups and swinging my arms. The most important thing is remembering and being thankful for the blessings of family, friends, and life. Compared to the lives and experiences of others, we are blessed.

I go to bed early every night, even when traveling. I often struggle to fall asleep, and when I do, it's usually only for 2-3 hours. However, I reflect on the day's productivity and actions and express gratitude during this time. I strive to hear from God, "Well done," but I recognize that I'm still a work in progress. I understand the importance of sleep, rest, healthy eating, and exercise. I do my best, and if I fall short one day, I aim to do better the next. We stumble and fall but can get back up and start again. I fight a spiritual battle every day because I know that the enemy wants me to fail and give up. I’ve done wrong for so long that he doesn’t want me to do good. So, he finds ways to tempt me, return to former habits, and renounce my commitment to do better.

Keep in mind that these processes work for me. They are not a cure-all for sadness and hurt. Some days will be better than others. Try not to call them bad days, even if they are. They can still be worse but don’t take it personally or as divine punishment. Trouble won’t last forever. As we age, we change our eating and drinking habits. We can do the same with our thinking habits.

© Another Part of Things

Keeping It Short

    I’ve been trying for months and am ready to give up on my search to add ads to my Google Blog. I am not technical savvy and do not understand the technical writings and explanations that Google uses. I feel disappointed and discouraged with all the obstacles in front of me. But, it has been rewarding to have this medium of writing. I may not have the graphs and scales who read my entries, but I am relieved I can express myself.

 

    I don’t write much or consistently. I write when I get a feeling about something that affects me. It’s easier to express myself in writing. It allows me to review what I expressed emotionally without causing too much misunderstanding and confusion. People will interpret what they want, anyway. Sometimes, just speaking, we can get too emotional in explaining our feelings about specific things. Our listeners might misinterpret what we meant and misunderstand our deliverance. The world is tense enough. Everyone seems to be on edge these days.

 

    It's disconcerting when I see some writers pour out their feelings, and their readers make disparaging remarks. Disrespect seems to be the norm these days, and kindness is lacking from those who hide behind the computer and on the streets. After the debate, expect to see more. Whatever is decided, I know that God is in control. I trust Him.

 

Lucky, The Little Shadow

Once upon a time, around two thousand years ago, a little shadow was born in a barn. A bright, shining star was over the barn, but a little, timid shadow was connected to a baby boy. The room was full of animals, and his parents wrapped the baby boy in swaddling clothes in a manger. They were tight pieces of cloth to cover the baby. There were a lot of people crowded around. The little shadow was afraid, so it hid behind the baby boy. God told him this baby was special before he was born, but he didn’t understand why. All babies are unique, but this one will have to save humanity. There was something about him, and he decided to stay as close as possible and as long as he could be next to the baby boy. The little shadow felt peaceful and assured he would never leave the baby’s side.

 

Over the years, he and the baby grew, and Lucky, once timid, became very confident being next to Jesus as they grew. Lucky saw that Jesus was making things better for the people around him, and this realization filled him with a sense of growth and inspiration. He saw how much Jesus loved everybody. Lucky remembered when Jesus separated from his family and was found in the temple. His parents were worried that he was lost and about his safety. Jesus told his mother that He was about his Father’s business. He loved his mother, Mary, but he will always obey his heavenly father, as he will obey his earthly father, Joseph, a carpenter.

 

Lucky was growing and could no longer be called little. He felt a strong sense of humility and compassion from Jesus. People everywhere have problems. He saw how mean some people were to Jesus. They called him names, laughed at him, and even tried to hurt him physically, but Jesus still loved them. Lucky suffered with him, too. He knew already that walking with Jesus would be difficult, but Lucky was committed to Jesus and admired the many wonderful he was doing.

 

Jesus kept on healing the sick and spreading the word of God. He would talk to people and tell them all about themselves. This angered some but convinced many others to follow him. Those angry people plotted against Jesus. They didn’t know that Jesus knew about it but was prepared to give his life to save the souls of humanity. Lucky went everywhere with Jesus and listened to every word he told the people and apostles. Together, they fed thousands of people, walked on water, raised the dead, cried, falsely accused, and cruelly tormented and eventually crucified. Even near Jesus’ last breath, Lucky remembered that he still forgave those mean people.

 

It wasn’t over. When everyone thought Jesus was dead and buried, he came back! Lucky could go with Jesus this time. Jesus told him it wasn’t necessary. Jesus was transformed like his Father. He was pure light.

A Lesson I learned This Week!

    What have I learned this week? I learned how great God is. I learned how powerful he is. I learned that I lacked faith. Doubt and fear are severe weaknesses. I learned how it affects my marriage, my wife, and myself. I learned that I can be better and that there is still time to get my act together. I’ve said I have a praying wife who prayed for me again this morning. I always feel at my lowest when I see that I hurt her in some way or another. I should be encouraging and supportive, but instead, I’m critiquing and tearing her down over what? Am I that picky? Am I that type of idiot? I have a great wife, a good woman, a caring and loving woman. It’s like I’m trying to sabotage this relationship.

 

    I went to confession yesterday at church, and the priest told me to trust God more. It would help to build up my faith in him so that when every doubt and fear occurs in my mind. I should tell myself to rely on God and do my part, leave the rest of Him, and trust in Him. That night, I slept off and on. I had a headache when I woke up in the middle of the night. I must’ve gone to the bathroom two or three times, and my dreams were surreal and weird. I took an aspirin for a headache, which did not exactly help either. I woke up this morning. I am grateful for that. God could have taken me. I was very sluggish, and once again, my wife prayed for me and herself to be a better wife. When she already is, when it’s me. We said our morning prayers together. Then, we went our separate ways to say our prayers.

 

    The smell of coffee brought me to the kitchen, where she made an omelet with olives and onions. She makes the best coffee and omelet. The ingredients are whatever we have left in the refrigerator. She was also getting dressed for church. 

 

    I have a good thing and still live in the past with regrets. I must overcome this. The evidence is genuine and tangible. The results are miracles and an appreciation of the Lord's goodness. I don’t have any excuses to ignore the miracles in my life.

 

Dreams of Peace!

They say old men dream dreams, and as I've gotten older, I've had many perplexing dreams that I don't understand. The world is becoming more dangerous every day. We're divided, contentious, hateful, and unkind to each other. We've been greedy and wanting more since the beginning of time, even when we have more than enough. These dreams I have are unlike anything I've dreamed of, and I don't understand them. God was there no matter where I was in those dreams or what I did. When I am awake, I still feel His presence. We are going to need it.

 

It's election year. Things have gotten worse. It's like a battle between good and evil. So much evil has been spewed, and it is backfiring back. Is there a cover-up? To me, if candidate Trump was wounded, why is there no one from the media or medical world discussing the effects? Some people took advantage of it to enhance his candidacy. After all, Trump appeared in some movies. Maybe he went old-school Hollywood to the nation. We will never know what was on the mind of the young man who died and the bystanders killed by him that fateful day.

 

As we know, Biden lost the debate against Trump, but no one knew what was happening in Biden‘s mind or body. Trump avoided the questions and never had any positive substance to support that he knew what he was doing. Nevertheless, he tried to come back, flubbing his news interview, and now, of course, he has Covid. His party does not support the incumbent, Joe Biden; they ask him not to run for reelection, and he complies.  

 

What is so shameful about our country right now is that it was built on the backs of enslaved peoples, who were forced to leave their homes. Immigrants, no less. Others left their homeland with free will, some with fear, seeking happiness and freedom from tyranny. This young nation fought wars on this land against the British, against tyranny, denouncing oppression, and finding democracy. And during that time, we’ve had a civil war and other wars to protect this democracy. Unfortunately, biased people never recovered from it. Ironically, some of these very descendants want to repeat living under an oppressive government, denying the pursuit of happiness for others and abandoning people’s rights that so many before them died for.

 

This article is not about any presidency or candidates running for president. It is about good versus evil. The trend towards blocking goodwill is a pattern around us. Division is keeping the country in depression and anxiety on edge. Is Project 2024 the new Mein Kampf and Doctrine of Fascism? Is a Democratic society moving towards a dictatorship? God forbid. Americans refuse to repeat the failures of the past here or anywhere else. This is a need and a time for prayer. It’s time for the true believers to stand up and pray for this nation’s future. There are no excuses. We all need to dream and hope for peace.

Loving is Hard, Forgiving is Harder

Life is already demanding enough to deal with the business of survival. Add families and relationships to it, and you can have some severe complications. We all know it, and if you are still living, you are still dealing with it. At some point, our emotions start to get the best of us when we open ourselves emotionally to someone we think will accept us as we are and we, them. Eventually, we get that feeling for the other person we call love. We can only hope that they would love us as much.

 

 During these emotional roller coasters, we find that the love was temporary for whatever reason, and then, we’re not in love anymore but left with a super heartache. Some of us are left with an emptiness, a void, because we gave too much of ourselves to make that love work. This type of love is nothing compared to the loss of a loved one who passed from one world to the next. Keep in mind that there are different kinds of love and levels. There’s not enough room and time to get into all of that. I want to keep it simple. Once we’ve gone through the breakups and heartaches, we build walls and barriers to avoid future hurts. Those who are “successful” in remaining in love find that staying in love is hard. It takes a lot of work to prove it, put up with it, and keep it. 

 

It takes more forgiving to make that love work. How much can you forgive? It’s up to the persons involved. None of us are perfect, yet we think that being in love should be. So, if one of us makes a mistake that shouldn’t have happened, it can be unforgivable. Our anger and pride will make us so blind and hurt that we forget that we could have been the ones who made the mistake. That’s what we do. We become hell to live with or stay in love when we get hurt.

 

 Hairline cracks become valleys, and it’s hard to cross. Some of us are unwilling to go the extra mile. It might show a sign of weakness or submission. Instead of trying, we give up and move on with the baggage, which becomes a new brick in our walls. Forgive? Some of our arguments are so stupid that we can’t even remember why. Yet, we are held hostage by our stupidity. Acts of distrust and betrayal can be unforgivable acts. Sharing your most trusted love with an outsider can be terrible. But what did we do to cause it? What was going on in our life that was so important that we took that love for granted and ignored the symptoms?

 

 Future loves will catch hell. We men have had our hearts broken and carry baggage, too! We look for honesty and trust, but we wait to see if our love will be returned. Now, we will go through the effort to get to know you and feel you. But we won’t waste your time and ours if it’s not legit. Well, I can’t talk about all men, not even the older, mature ones, but I think a general consensus stands behind what I say about this. Some of you ladies can’t believe it’s natural, so you balk and put us through tests. Is that necessary? I asked because no one likes to be tested. If you don’t want us, say so! Some of you will lose a good thing. When you do, don’t look back. Woulda, coulda, and shoulda won’t have any values. Now, who will forgive you?

 

In closing this entry, love is a gift we find and share. It is true that some people will reject your gift or won't appreciate it. But don't let that stop you. Love is a unique gift that God has for us all to share. I don't think we would reject His love, but we do when we reject it from each other. This is Advent for many religions, and we should be more patient, understanding, and loving than ever. It was God's Unconditional Love for us to send His only son to be sacrificed so horribly by man to save us. I wish you all a peaceful, blessed, and loving Christmas Season.

Thanks For Being a Blessing, Cousin!

How do, Cousin?

 

My wife & I ate at this restaurant in Savannah, Ga., some years ago. It was an old, segregated bus station the one co-owner, Mashama Bailey, executive chef, and a black woman, bought. She kept the Colored-Only and White-Only signs up in the restaurant. I’m guessing she kept those signs as reminders of the past and whose hands the restaurant is now in. The picture is a humbling reminder of bad times. Lord knows some of us lived it. It doesn’t look like much has changed except modern technology and progress.  Some attitudes are still fighting for the return of Jim Crow. 

 

            There were some good times in our community, too. I remember how the adults looked out for our young and old neighbors. The community stepped in when a neighbor was ill, didn’t have food, or the children needed clothing. We don’t see this too much in our community now. Times have changed, and we have, too.

 

            I know, Dallas, you’re old school, a part of the community passed down generations ago. My Wife and I are very grateful for your sacrifices for us. After all this wordiness, we wanted to say thank you, Cuz! You are appreciated!

 

May you be blessed on earth and in heaven. We love you.