New Year, Same Old Resolutions!

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!            

            Congratulations!  If you’re reading this, you made it through 2023!  I don’t know about any of you, but 2023 was a memorable year for me!  It was not harsh for my family, but for the social communities, it was downright devastating.  There were online attacks towards celebrities from trolls and other celebrities on many venues, including YouTube, X, Meta, and Tic Toc.  Slaps from Will to Chris on national TV at the Oscars, the Color Purple Movie controversy, Jamie Foxx breakdown, P Diddy assaults controversy, P Diddy parties including TD Jakes, Taraji, and Oprah low payments for the new Color Purple.  Let’s not overlook big money taking over the poor people’s land in South Carolina.  “Karens” are still accusing minorities that they don’t belong in areas where they live, and cops are still mistreating minorities or shooting them. Immigrants are clogging up the border every day.  These are just a few issues on the social front.  

 

Turbeville was blocking military promotions in the political arena, and McCarthy was making deals to be Speaker even if it took multiple times and wasted taxpayers’ money. Jordan’s only goal is being vindictive for his savior, Donald, for those who supported the January 6^th insurrection.  McCarthy and Gaetz showdown, Jordan now running for speaker but ultimately settled by an unknown, Mike Johnson.  There is no need to discuss Donald Trump; he never left the news but does seem more deranged than ever.  Israel and the Hamas haven’t changed. They’re still fighting and pirating in the Gulf of Aden and the Red Sea.  The republican debates have been a joke with no substance, like Congress.

 

Even professional football officiating has been awful and often controversial.  Good teams have lost their standings of poor, inattentive calls.  Of course, teams and players weren’t so professional on and off the field.  Some of you already know.  In the college arena, ranked teams were split in their ranking.  There is no need to discuss the economy; Biden’s economics worked, but for how long?  Prognosticators are predicting savings in 2024 because 2025 will be different.  People are divided all over the place?

 

2024 is a continuation of 2023, unfinished business.  Each individual must face his/her trials and tests for 2024. Thank God we have gotten this far.  We all must be more diligent in our efforts to seek peace and the truth.  We’re not better than the other, but we can strive towards better communication and understanding with each other.  We are still more powerful working together than separately.  The world is watching and waiting to take over this country while we are divided.

 

We can make 2024 better.  It’s up to all of us.

Rejoice, Rejoice, Rejoice!

Rejoice all, for this day and time, the Lord is near!  The year is quickly coming to an end.  I must be getting older because time seems to fly by.  We will enter a new year in less than two weeks.  Next week is Christmas.  We might or might not be ready for gifts, but will we be prepared for the return of Jesus?  Have we decided to repent from some of our petty and devious ways?  Some of us can’t let go of being trifling in our actions.  We could make an attempt to change, but do we want to?  It’s not easy to do right, but it seems that doing wrong has always been simple.  We were born with sin, but we were also saved by mercy and grace.  Jesus gave his life to fulfill the will of the Father to save us.  Emanuel has never forsaken us or abandoned us.

 

I agree that we seemed to be surrounded by bad news.  Chaos abounds, and hatred is reveling in man’s atrocities towards each other.  I don’t have to go into details, but the innocents are suffering over folks' lust for domination and greed.  It is hard to find joy in this mess, but we can.  We can begin with the little things.  Such as waking up, our health could be worse, sight, smell, taste, hearing, touching, holding the people we love, and speaking to tell them we love them.  We can change our old habits and make it a goal to take one step at a time.  We could begin now during Advent to start New Year's habits.  Whatever we do, let’s keep it positive.

 

I believe the fewer excuses we find, the better we will be and feel.  I wish you all a blessed and safe Christmas and New Year!  Find your joy!

A Seat At The Table?

            Whose table do you want to sit at, and who will be there? There are many tables, but only a few seats remain. What is the price of admission to each table? Even if God's table is free, it still requires time, repentance, honesty, obedience, mercy, and forgiveness. Some of the other tables require at least money, fame, or power, and I cannot afford any of those. Regardless, sitting at a table grants you a voice and an opportunity to speak and be heard. It's about representation, but the table owner will control the conversation. Remember that discretion is the better part of valor, and be cautious of yourself and others. In other words, choose your battles wisely.

 

            There are certain advantages to sitting at the table, such as enjoying certain perks. Moreover, sitting near the owner shows a sign of respect. However, respect may only sometimes be genuine, as people may pretend to respect you in your presence while talking behind your back. This is a common occurrence that many have experienced, and it is often the case that people have hidden agendas. The song "Smiling Faces" by The Undisputed Truth perfectly encapsulates this situation. Therefore, being aware of others' intentions and keeping your guard is vital.

 

            It is an honor, and since you have the opportunity to speak at the table, what will be your platform, and how will you articulate it?  What kind of tone will you use?  Do you have a resolution, a template, or an idea?  Will you compromise to obtain your recommendations or suggestions?  Or will you yield to the more powerful?  What will your attitude be like?  Expect supporters and non-supporters to be neutral and uncommitted, but you’ll know where people stand on the issues.  It could be important being there, or it could be a facade.  I wish you wisdom, integrity, courage, and honesty.

Veterans Day Entry Follow-Up with Soma on November 10-11, 2023!

The Soma Store that my wife and I had POC concerns about made contact with her two weeks ago.  They invited her to return and to meet with the young lady who treated us professionally and respectfully.  We appreciate the gesture, but we have not returned and are unsure if we will.  The corporate office also contacted her and offered appealing discounts, but the experience has still left a bad feeling in our minds. I wondered how many others have been silent about their own experiences.  It was never about the discounts.  My wife enjoyed the products and the quality.  She was already taking advantage of the discounted prices.  It was more about being ignored and being mistreated for being a particular color.  

 

I never intended to have the corporate office impose penalties on individuals whose means of earning an honest living.  It’s about putting aside racial stereotypes and mindsets, especially when dealing with the public.  It’s not okay to behave foolishly and be ignorant of the effects the behavior might have on others. 

Let’s be courageous enough and have a dialogue about what we seem to misunderstand, clear up those issues, and work towards changing these mindsets.  Sometimes, punishment and coercion result in the opposite results.  Our communities have enough to deal with as it is.  I still believe that with effort, resilience, and understanding, we can accomplish our goals, one issue at a time, in due season.

 

Hats off to Soma for making the effort.  Thank you.

Veterans’ Day Weekend 9-10, 2023, Was Not About Veterans Here!

    My wife has been a loyal customer of Soma for several years, and not once has she ever been mistreated or denied excellent customer service until the past two days.  Whenever she would go shopping, I would find a seat and wait patiently while she searched for her sizes.  She’s petite, and it takes some time for her to see what she’s looking for.  She also does her research by going online and ordering and finding what is available at her local Soma store.  

 

    She returned an online order for a different size Friday evening at Soma Store 5318 in Trenholm Plaza, Forest Acres, South Carolina.  Her salesperson never greeted her, and she appeared unwilling to help her find her sizes for the exchange.  After interrogating my wife when the purchase was made, the salesperson stopped the process after she was shown the online documents.  This never stopped the salesperson from her rude behavior because she pointed to where the items might be located but never lifted a finger to assist her.  It was at this time my wife decided to leave.  Only two customers with a baby were together, being helped, it seemed, by the store manager or supervisor who wore pajamas.  She was too emotional to finish the shopping.

 

    We returned Saturday morning, and the same salesperson was there, hanging some clothing on a rack by the registers.  She avoided us when she saw us and walked off the sales floor.  My wife went to the area where she was told to look last evening and found her items.  E, another salesperson, greeted us and assisted my wife.  The manager or supervisor was helping another customer while we were there.

 

    My wife did not want me to address this issue. However, my explanation was and still is that ignoring customers and being rude is not beneficial to any organization serving the people regardless of who they are.  If a salesperson is reluctant to help the people contributing to the growth of any business, they are stunting the growth of said business.  What matters is that we felt unwanted by that salesperson who had no intention to assist us and did not want to be bothered by us.  Being rude and inconsiderate is acceptable lately.  People aren’t apologetic or concerned about addressing current social issues.

 

I am not asking that this salesperson be penalized; no one knows what is going through another person’s mind or what she may have encountered before we arrived.  But, repeating the same attitude the next morning does not convince me she was having “a bad day” the day before.  I respectfully request that someone with diplomacy and tact speak with her about improving her customer service and people skills.  My wife will continue to shop with Soma.  She enjoys their products.

 

    Still, I contacted their corporate office, which is somewhere overseas.  I explained the same situation to them.  I also read this store's reviews, which confirmed my suspicions about the store’s staff.  I read the store’s reviews. It seems that the one or 2-star reviews came from People of Color, and it does not appear that anything has been done about the staff’s negative behavior.  I also saw that negative reviewers were to call 866-768-7662 for “opportunities for resolution.”  The opportunities may exist for resolutions, but not followed through.  I felt obligated to inform corporate that good customer service is for all customers regardless of skin color.  The latest one-star review was three weeks ago regarding a similar situation.  After reading several other reviews, it seems to be a trend at this location of how some people are treated, valuable customers or not.  My intuition told me not to write a review but to go directly to the source.  I did and it was a disappointment.

 

    During this weekend’s experience, I realized that the corporate office would never be informed or even hear of any negative experiences from their customers.  They are being shielded by these “contact operators” and not going further than the phone or email.  They will find an excuse, especially when money is involved.  One consultant even went as far as to tell us, “Don’t go back to the store.”  2023, same institutionalized racism, different people.  The years only have changed.

 

Anger, Disgusted and Discouraged!

            Yesterday, I got so angry and discouraged that I didn’t know what to do with myself.  All I could think of was what would help people get their acts together.  I saw Episode One of “Lawman: Bass Reeves” on Paramount.  It was also the last episode that I will look at.  I read that it is a true story about a slave who later in life became a federal deputy Marshall who survived the rigors and racism in the Wild West post-Civil War.  The story is well-written, and the actors are well-respected and convincing.  In fact, the story and scenes were convincing enough to have taken me back in time and emotions.  I started questioning how hatred could be so acceptable by the so-called Christian folk to cause them to abuse, mistreat, and kill another group of people who didn’t have the same color as them.  I got disgusted and angry, so I had to research who Bass Reeves was and why this was the first time I ever heard of this black lawman.

 

              The deeper I dove in, the more I realized that this slave who became a top lawman was intentionally kept in the history books.  Black people were not meant to have heroes.  It also seemed to me that black folks are not meant to arrest or shoot white folks, either, which Mr. Reeves could do both and be supported by the federal courts, not always by the people in the courts.  I’m a Lone Ranger fan, and I never heard of this man, but from my research, it could have been reasonable that Gaylord Dubois used Bass Reeves as the template for the Lone Ranger.  The Lone Ranger had Tonto, the son of an actual Mohawk Chief, who rode with him side-by-side.  They were able to enter Indian territories and make arrests of the white men seeking to hide and Indians who broke the law.  Bass Reeves lived with Indians and spoke several of their languages.  They accepted him, even deputizing some of them to become lawmen.  Like Bass Reeves, the Lone Ranger wore disguises, fooling so many outlaws that some even accepted him in their camps.  We know that the Lone Ranger was fictional, but we know now that Bass Reeves was real.

 

                What tripped my emotions yesterday convinced me that people are willing to hide the historical values of what others did to build this country by devaluing their contributions and rewriting history to protect their weaknesses.  We see it daily in folks fighting against the freedoms the ancestors and founders of this great land died for.  Certain books cannot be read, racism does not exist, and people who are “woke” are wrong, but liars and deceivers are accepted and followed. Why rewrite history when it's easier to ignore it?  Nearest Green, a former slave and master distiller, was finally recognized as passing the process of making whiskey to the maker of Jack Daniels. Not many people, drinkers and non-drinkers, are aware of this.  It had to take Fawn Weaver, the Black CEO of the Uncle Nearest Brand, to bring this hidden gem to light.  History is truth, whether we like it or not.  Not being taught and not being educated about the very tenets this country was built on is hiding the truth of liberty.

                Many of these people who are against the freedoms of others are descendants of immigrants who left their countries for the very freedoms they were denied there.  I refuse to believe that this great nation has become a nation of hypocrites and fake Christians.  I think the majority is silent and has become numb and quiet to the shame they are witnessing.   But I also believe that God is still in control and that we all should reconcile with him before we reconcile with each other.  I cannot change the heart of my brother, no matter how much I want him to see things my way and vice-versa.  Only God can do that, so we should run to Him.  Then I could see you and me working together towards unity.  

 

                Honorable mention to Bishop T. D. Jakes, whose sermon was meant for me during my anger, disgust, and discouragement episode.

An Open Letter to my Brother’s Son-In-Law!

            I know you’re surprised to hear from me.  Today is our mother’s birthday and it is always special to me.  She would have been 93 today.  I can feel myself being in a joyful and sorrowful mood at the same time.  It could also be the cause of this letter.  I remember how she raised my brother and me with the help of her mother when my father decided to pursue a life of his own.  Do I hold him responsible for my own life?  Maybe.  Even though I hold myself accountable for my own actions, I truly believe if he was still involved with us, I would have made a decision to make the military my career and wouldn’t have resigned my commission.  If you’re thinking that I could have made that decision on my own you’re right.  But I wanted to hear from him, he was supposed to be an authority in our home, and because I followed in his footsteps by joining the Navy.

 

            It’s hard to raise a family as a single parent without issues, I can only imagine if there are difficulties that are constantly in the way day in and day out.  What a burden it is.  Children did not ask to be born but are here and alive.   Some are products of love and some, are mistakes.  They still need to know that there are people that they can count on.   Especially, when they need advice and support.  Otherwise, failure, depression, and anxiety could cause them undue pressure later in life.  Perhaps, I’m feeling melancholy because of today, but suppressing emotions can be a time bomb.

 

            Whatever we may feel about our spouses, there is never a need to abuse them in any method.  I have had so many failures in my life when there were times when giving up was the best escape.  I failed at some careers, relationships, and goals and received so many denials that it was easier to call it quits with life.  Who should I have blamed?  Nobody.  We man up and hold ourselves accountable. Only some things will go our way.  We fall down but by the grace of God, we get back up.  That was a decision that I made that day, to get back up.  Why be another statistic when I can prove to myself, not to anyone else, that I will survive, not on my own, but with God, I can be better today than yesterday.

 

            Starting alone all over again is expensive after investing so much together in a family.  My father after so many years of our lives in his later years actually expected my mother to take him back in.  It was no surprise that she didn’t.  The children were now adults with their own families.  He found a place in the neighborhood near my uncle and transitioned in a few years.  He transitioned alone.

 

            I wondered what my brother would have said to you and what his reaction would be.  He had a temper in his younger days. He would have mellowed out.  You have your life to live but pray for a peaceful one where the conscious won’t remind you every day that was it truly worth it.  When one out of two marries for love and the other for lust, there is never a bond in the first place.  I do have a humble request.   Help your estranged family out, maintain contact, stay in the child’s life and if not wanted, be near, protect, and show love.  You had a part in creating your child and cannot renounce a proof of beauty.

 

No longer a child, I can look back and remember how blessed we were to have a mother we had who loved us and made sacrifices for us.  As a parent, I would like to be remembered the same way.  I want you to know that if my brother loved you, I wish the best for you, and have no animosity towards you.  Live the life you were meant to live and have no regrets or remorse for the decisions you make.  Don’t look for any excuses, live with the choices you make.  I wish you well.  May God bless you and keep you.