For October 21, 2009

Today is our mother’s birthday. Had she lived, she would have been 79. Even though it’s been only two years ago, it still seems like yesterday when I last talked to her and she said she wasn’t feeling well. Tears are beginning to well up and I’m having a hard time typing this. My grandmom and her instilled in me a can-do attitude and to always treat people the way you would like to be treated. That is, be kind, patient and respectful to others, even if you didn’t like them. They are still someone else’s child. I wanted to do something special at her gravesite but I know that she would rather for me to keep things simple and pay tribute by being a better person. I can almost hear her say, baby, don’t waste your money on me, I don’t need that. Mom liked nice things but she wasn’t an extravagant person. I think a lot of that has rubbed off on me. I’m not a materialistic person. I want to enjoy some things as long as I live but I also know that I can’t take any of it with me. I also know that I like peace and comfort not stress and drama. I buy what I can afford, and enjoy what I have. Keeping up with big payments can be stressful even if it’s showing others how much I have. Well, you just about have to kill yourself by working so hard to keep it. But, in the process, how much are you willing to give up? And who and what are you willing to give up? I have seen people with such expensive things that they can’t enjoy it. They can’t enjoy vacations or just be still because their mind is on what they’ll have to do at work to keep making the big bucks. Mom, talked about appreciating the simple things, not be jealous of anyone, but be true to yourself. She was my confidante and as I got older I realized that life itself isn’t as complicated as we think. She took time with my stupidity and ignorance, always forgiving and always patient. Losing someone you love leaves an emptiness inside. Cherish them, take time with them, appreciate them and love them. Because someday, you or them, will have some wonderful, unforgettable memories to share.

That Inner Voice

Sometimes we are so busy rushing through the routines of life that we don’t have or take the time to listen to the Voice of God. I mean we get so wrapped up going to work, doing our work, picking up the kids, running to the store, cleaning up the house, dealing with traffic congestions, and maintaining our sanity that we actually don’t have the time to make time for a moment of peace. This is what we do! We rip and run to show that we are productive and not wasting our time. We don’t think about the stress and strain brought on by some of our own self-inflicted necessities. We are in such a hurry that sometimes, we ignore that inner voice that tells us to take another route or do something differently. Then we get perturbed with ourselves when we are stuck in traffic or didn’t look down when we should have. I usually say, I knew I should have done it the way my mind told me. Okay, we ignored the Voice that time. But what do we do when we’re supposed to be enjoying ourselves and don’t take the time to appreciate it? Do we take the time to eat with our families? Keep up with old friends? Greet passersby with a smile? Do we really take the time to appreciate the sights during our walks? What about looking at our loved ones? Do we even bother to take the time to pray and thank God during our busy schedules? Miracles are happening every day and we don’t notice. We separate ourselves from God and ourselves for the sake of completing today’s mission. Today, we’re already planning what to do tomorrow. We have to! If we can get a jump and expect the unexpected we think we are already one step ahead. We’ve forgotten that we are on loan. Whether it’s today or tomorrow, nothing is guaranteed except death and taxes.

Attitude

Encarta Dictionary defines Attitude as a personal view of something, bodily posture, challenging manner, orientation of aircraft’s axes, and orientation of spacecraft. Of course, a positive attitude can take us to a higher altitude. Since this topic is not about aircraft, we can presume that I want to discuss personal views. It’s not easy being or staying positive. Our surroundings alone, not counting socio-economic conditions, can be the excuse we need not to be positive. That in itself implies that wanting to be positive requires discipline and commitment. In other words, having a positive attitude takes a lot of work. For the sake of not staying rhetorical, let’s keep this simple. The right attitude can make a major difference in your life even when those unforeseen obstacles pop up during our journey in life. We all have had our shares of ups and downs. It seems that the downs dominate. But there is nowhere written that we would be exempt from life’s problems. In fact, Adam and Eve had there share of problems and we all know that they had everything they wanted. But, they made their choice, just as we choose to be either positive or negative. We tend to choose the negative. We can’t help it. Misery, though depressing, makes us focus on the reality of life that bad things happen. And there is nothing that can be done about it. And because we expect the worse, we draw the negative to us. We are what we think. Mother Theresa called problems, gifts. Imagine waiting in line for a while and considering it a gift. Imagine being stuck in traffic for hours and saying it’s a gift. Imagine wondering how you’re going to pay bills with no money available as a gift. As hard as we try to develop our relationship with God and try to do right, when things go wrong, we choose the negative emotion because it’s comfortable and easy to deal with. How can we look at issues as gifts? Trying to be positive is hard enough but look at problems as gifts will take more than human effort. We really need to look for help from a higher being. Frankly, I don’t think it would hurt. What do we have to lose? One thing for sure, we can do something with the presents we have. We can at least try.

Semper Fidelis

In these times of political and national disagreements, let us take a moment to pay tribute to our fallen heroes. As I said before, men and women serve our country in the various capacities in the military, medical response, and law enforcement put their lives on the line everyday. They do it not just as an obligation of duty, but they as a need to make a difference. It is indeed regrettable regardless of age, race, or culture that their families and others will never see them again. It is bad enough that those same families worry day and night whether their loved one will return home safely. How ironic can it be that we lose a South Carolina State Trooper leading a memorial procession for a fallen fellow trooper, who also, was killed in the line of duty in 1992 on the same route? We may never know what was in the mind of the elderly lady that did it. I believe that she is experiencing a personal hell that only she can live with. But, now is the time to mourn a lost life. Both families, friends, community, and the department are mourning a person that was very dear to them. So in these times of frustrations and whatever you would like to add, let us for a moment say a pray for those heroes who take an oath to protect us everyday and lose their lives in doing so. Say a prayer for those people that are close to you that are being taken for granted. You have found a better peace, brother!

Family Love

This insert will be about peaceful, pleasant and positive talk. I’m tired of reading, hearing, and seeing so much negativity and evil done against each other in the news. So today, I’m going to devote this submission to focus on people helping each other. Of course, you know that this was labor intensive. It was hard to find something good that the media reports but I’m sure even the media can get tired of bad news. Here is a wonderful story about a father’s love. “Dad simply wanted a souvenir - not a national television appearance. Steve Monforto won over many hearts after his 3-year-old daughter tossed a foul ball he caught at a Phillies game back onto the field. Stunned by his toddler's toss, all Dad could do was hug her. "I didn't want her to think she did anything wrong," Monforto said on WIP-AM radio Wednesday." By the way, Philly beat the Washington Nationals 5-0. That’s what we need more of, real love for one another. I give the media some credit for this. Hopefully, they'll find more good things to talk about.

Rest in Peace, Mr. Baby John

My baptismal godfather passed this weekend in silence. His name was Crayton but we called Mr. Baby John. Ever since we were children that was what we always called him. He owned a store in the neighborhood when we were kids. He had another brother who owned a store in another part of the neighborhood a little farther from where we lived. Those were the days when a nickel could go a long way. You could get push-ups, ice cream in a cup with a stick at the bottom to push it up. Ice cream cups, ginger snap cookies, and an assortment of candies. Even a penny could buy two for one cookies. As a child there were so much you could get with change. A quarter made you feel rich. After we'd look for loose change or earn our allowance, we would go to Mr. Baby John's and load up. He was a really nice guy, we couldn't be loud or disrespectful in the store but that was expected of us. He knew all of our parents and would tell if we were out of line. Back in those days, parents, teachers and neighbors didn't have a problem disciplining us kids. He wouldn't let us "hang out" in front of his store but we played football and baseball in the back of it. He and his wife had three children, two daughters and a son. All are very successful. Most of the guys back then had a crush on his oldest daughter. I could go about our childhood but I won't. This is a tribute for Mr. Baby John. As Mr. Baby John got older, he closed up his store, retired and did other things. He also owned a building next to the store where he stored things and let other people in the neighborhood use it. I'm much older now but back in those days no one thought of taking anything from his store. If you needed anything, he would give it to you. He knew us like that. This is just a small tribute to a good man. All of us have our ways and all of us have good and bad days. Whatever it might have been, Mr. Baby John treated us kids like human beings. Rest in peace, Mr. Baby John, we'll miss you old timers.

The Agony and Disrespect

The agonizing reality of Congressman’s Wilson absolute disrespect for the president of the United States and the total lack of respect for the office he holds implies that Mr. Wilson does not even respect the man as an equal. What Mr. Wilson has managed to do, whether it was his intent or others, was incite that part of society that will accept the fact that a black man was elected. His qualifications mean nothing to them. They still see the color of the man rather than his character. Mr. Wilson can accept the dishonor of making parts of that negative society now fashionable since it no longer has to hide behind sheets and pillowcases. Thank God not everyone feels the same way. There is good and bad in all races. What I hear is that “just because I disagree with Obama’s policies, doesn’t make me a racist.” You are right! But don’t use that phrase to distract me, either. I don’t see a problem when people disagree, but when not allowed to discuss their views by shouting over them and disrupting a peaceful setting for the sole purpose of distracting the truth, is disrespectful and rude. This is a clever ploy by special interest groups to pollute and distort the facts that can help fellow Americans. That’s right, I said subversive. These are dissident, rebellious folk who cannot accept a black president and want the country to return to good old days where minorities knew their place. The culture of the extreme ultra-right and left are not the only ones that carry guns. The use of fear and intimidation is still effective on the less fortunate. But, there is a new generation that will not carry on the divisive customs of years gone by. They can’t see that whatever we adults do will affect them in the future. I might sound negative to you but I’m not. I am disgusted and appalled that even now in 2009, prejudice and discrimination is alive and still accepted by some. All of this mess is on the heels of a major controversy about the president telling kids to stay in school and learn. Some folks were so concerned about him possibly feeding their minds on his political agenda that they kept their children out of school. How ironic, the president told them how important it is to stay in school. Our children need to be educated to compete in this world market. Let’s keep the jobs here rather than outsource them. At least, give the children a chance to compete. Education is the key and some people know this. It can take you to a different level in society. Uneducated people, unfortunately, do not have those chances for good jobs and pay, thus, remain in low income areas. Which case in turn becomes government dependent. This is what this president sees. He knows education can strengthen America. People would read more and get involved with the community. The more educated means you can make your own common sense decisions and not be led by others simply because they say so. This president has fought every day since he’s been in office and no one from the right has given him any credit at all. From my perspective, if they did, it would be an admission that the president is doing something right and they’d rather see America destroyed before they admit it. Our state (SC) has more than enough problems but our focus is on the governor and now the congressman. Why aren’t our elected officials looking out for the citizens of this state? They want the votes so bad they are willing to neglect the whole than the part? What is wrong with this? You might represent your constituents in your district but when you leave this state you are representing all of South Carolina. Will Joe Wilson’s son, a candidate for the State Adjutant General, feel the same way? Old folks used to say “an acorn doesn’t fall far from the tree.” This is 9/11, a day to pay tribute to the fallen but we have crashed websites blogging about Joe Wilson and his outburst. I personally feel that he didn’t give a real apology, he wanted to use the time to explain his argument. As his son defended him, which I do understand, he too, stumbled through an explanation of his frustration with the president. A real man would accept responsibility for his actions. This mess can setback race relations decades. That could be somebody’s intentions. We were all so proud when the first black president was elected because it took all of us Americans to do it. We elect these people to represent us, if they can’t do the job we can elect someone else. That’s what happens to us on our regular jobs. We can’t do the job our employer finds some one else that will. We must get past name recognition and do research on these people that are running. Otherwise, if we vote simply on the name, we might get continued mess from another generation. Granted our candidate might lose but by the grace of God, people running for office will know that we, the people, mean business.