Many of us have misguided ideas about future relationships. We want a model on our arms but at the same time we would like to have her as our “best friend.” How many of us have the privilege of being able to have at least one of those choices? How many of us don’t get either? We’re hardly able to find a partner more so than a mate. And we wonder why so many relationships end on sour notes. We get into them for the wrong reasons. Lust fulfills us for the moment, lust does it temporarily. But it’s a lot more than just an orgasm. We all know how long that can last, just not long enough. Guys, we can’t fool ourselves. Maybe we are in it just for the nookie, but keep it real, we want more than that. When we are in love, it does, feel good! We just don’t know how long it will last. Maybe some of us tend think that love is temporary.
Sometimes, we tend to find excuses for the things that don't work out for us. We tend to blame others instead of taking responsibility for our actions, which only elevates the excuses. This behavior also applies to standing up for what is right. We often remain silent and wait for someone else to take the initiative instead of holding ourselves accountable. "What's your excuse, now?" is about empowering ourselves to make choices that will help us feel comfortable and confident in our skin.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Well, What Do We Want?
What do you want from the person? What do you want from the relationship? Look for it, find it and stick to it. Trust and honesty can not be bought. They are gained by communication and closeness. If you have a high work ethic, you would want someone to at least work full-time. And show a desire to work steady. Hey, you know exactly what I am saying. But that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Once, you let a liar get away with the “stretch” of the truth. It’s on! It’s easy for them to hold back. They justify it so well. The biggest setback is the liar thinks that you don’t listen and not smart enough to know what he/she is saying. All of us have some code of morals. For some guys, it’s not noticeable at all. But it’s there. We can’t continue to use excuses from childhood, environment, society and education to disrespect our women. Yeah, there are women that don’t respect themselves but let’s not try to figure that out. We all have problems, don’t complicate them.
Relationships Are Hard Work
Who learned the lesson from breakups and broken hearts? Can it be balanced enough? One thing is guaranteed. Any relationship is hard work and if you both intend for it to last, take the good with the bad. And if you want to give 100%, go ahead. If it doesn’t work out, don’t get all broken up and hurt someone. Nobody forced you, you made the choice. Get the hell out and move on!
Move On
A broken heart takes a while to mend. You can appear to behave foolishly when you are too wrapped up in love. You can’t act or think rationally. You become out of control. Jealousy sets in and you become a complete idiot. Hey! If you are not wanted, let it go! Jealousy complicates things. It can cause major problems with too many people. Sometimes, people can cause you major problems. Long-term problems. Your irrational action can mess you up. So don’t be stupid. Move on! Men have a longer recovery period than women after a break up. We take the break up to heart and want to retaliate. We can’t forgive as easily as women do. But none of us will forget.
The Basis of Love
Hope and love are strong words. They even have biblical connections. Do not play with them! Is your future love worth it? Can you see yourself with that person? Ask yourself. Is your partner pushy, domineering? Do you feel each time you see each other, you have to undergo an inspection? Are you critiqued about what you wear or how you behave? Marriage is not a game and you want a partner not a cell mate. When hope ebbs, soon will your love. I truly do not believe that any relationship is easy. How deep is that relationship? Was it built on the curves, the hardness, and the softness? The image looks great for now. How important is the image after several years when gravity and age comes? How deep is your maturity, more importantly your love, to see pass that? I know if the loving is good and the body is right, you’re in it for the long run. At least, while it lasts. Then when the change come, what are you going to do?
In & Out Won't Work In This
Love is not an electric switch that you can turn off and on. It’s not that kind of action. Hearts are broken, feelings are hurt and wounds are deeply opened. People, be honest with each other, not abusive in anyway. Satan, the enemy, will use any deception he can find to destroy a loving relationship, even in the name of religion. But, if you are rooted in the love of Christ who strengthens you, your spirit will recognize deceiving spirits. But if the one you love justifies a reason for their action in the name of that spirit, respect it and move on. Remember, there is a time and a season for all things. God is good and merciful, all of time. In and out relationships, though at times, may seem destined for marriage, usually are heartaches and emotional roller coasters. They can do more harm than good.
Dogs & Bad Boys
We all heard that “a good woman is hard to find and when you find her keep her!” I learned that the same standard should be applied to men! But you don’t hear anyone pushing that. “Men are dogs and don’t expect anymore than that from them." Good men get abused because women want a challenge to convert somebody. Therefore, they prefer the “dogs”. They want the thugs, the beaters and the “bad boys” of the world,. Should we put all women in that category? Or should I say this is more an exception than a rule?
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