Over the past two months, I have come to recognize this season in my life as a time of divine testing and spiritual refinement. From the perspective of my Christian faith tradition, trials and tribulations are not arbitrary; God permits them for the purpose of growth, sanctification, and strengthening of faith. In James 1:2–4, we are encouraged to “consider it pure joy… whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.” This scripture echoed in my heart as I realized that the intense challenges I faced were not signs of God’s absence, but rather evidence of His deep work within me.
I found myself confronted by distractions and spiritual resistance that seemed beyond my control. These weren’t just day-to-day inconveniences, but soul-shaking forces that tried to pull my attention away from God and toward anxiety, self-doubt, and worldly concerns. In my tradition, we understand this as spiritual warfare. Ephesians 6:12 reminds us that we wrestle “not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world.” I felt ill-equipped to stand firm, not because God was not present, but because I had not fully embraced the armor He offers. My desire to grow in the Spirit was sincere, yet I was afraid that I lacked the spiritual maturity to navigate the trials placed before me.
As I sought answers, I continued attending church, even when I felt weary or unworthy. One Sunday, a message was preached that shifted my entire perspective. It focused on the biblical theme of purification, a process repeatedly emphasized in Scripture. Psalm 51, a prayer of repentance, pleads, “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.” In that moment, I understood that the suffering I was experiencing was part of God’s cleansing work. He was sanctifying me, burning away the impurities that were keeping me from deeper intimacy with Him. Like gold refined by fire, I was being prepared for greater usefulness in His Kingdom.
This was a humbling revelation. My faith tradition teaches that we cannot draw near to a holy God while harboring sin, bitterness, or spiritual apathy. The book of Hebrews instructs us to “make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord” (Hebrews 12:14). I realized that what I once saw as setbacks were, in fact, invitations to repentance and renewal. The Spirit of God was not withholding Himself from me. He was inviting me into deeper surrender. I began to understand that purification is not just about moral cleanliness but about being wholly set apart for God’s purposes.
In light of this, I now see these months as part of my sanctification journey, a core doctrine in my Christian faith. It is the ongoing work of the Holy Spirit to make believers more like Christ. This understanding has not only changed how I view my recent struggles but has also deepened my trust in God’s wisdom and timing. Faith, after all, is not measured by how easily we believe in times of comfort, but by how we cling to God when everything seems to fall apart. Through prayer, Scripture, fellowship with believers, and the regular practice of confession and repentance, I have found the strength to remain grounded.
My heart is still being shaped, and I am far from perfect. But now, I walk with a clearer sense of purpose. The trials I’ve endured have drawn me into deeper communion with God. I am learning that the way to grow in the Spirit is not through ease but through perseverance, submission, and faith that God uses even our brokenness to bring about His glory. As 1 Peter 5:10 promises, “After you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace… will Himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.” I hold onto that promise as I continue to walk this journey of purification, trusting in the One who began a good work in me to bring it to completion.
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